fandomtownies | Caritas; Wednesday [06/30].

Entry tags:

Caritas; Wednesday [06/30].

"No, Tino, I do not want to know what you taste like."

An ashtray. Summer was definitely convinced that licking Tino would be like licking the bottom on an ashtray, or maybe like the bottom of a trash bin that contained a leaky bag, but she had no intention of being able to deny or confirm these theories, because she was absolutely not licking her coworker, and her coworker had better not be licking her--

Aaaaand that was how one of the bartenders that night ended up taking a nice, drenched walk back to the bar after a trip to the pond, dripping considerably as she made her way back behind the bar to find a towel to dry off with, glaring at Tino the whole time.

"You know, that sanctuary spell is a great idea in theory," Summer muttered as she toweled off, "but there should definitely be some key exceptions put in place for it."

Like decking your coworker for licking you.

And possibly decking him again later for looking so smug about it.

Wednesday Jello Shot Specials

First One Free to All Wednesday Activity Participants!

All Three Free if You Let Tino Lick You

Marshmallow Surprise
Pink Lemonade
Bacon Bourbon

Caritas is open!

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Please don't lick the zombies.

Or you do you.

Summer will definitely judge you, though.

Have a drink from a slightly damp bartender or one that clearly has boundary issues.

"...Who'd you punch?" Jesse asked the second she stepped inside.

"Take a wild guess," said Summer, whose glare at her fellow bartender was doing a lot of the heavy lifting in the clue department as she got Jesse her beer and set it down for her on the bar before she even reached it, probably.

"All I'm saying is that it's a good thing he lives right here, too, because he should not feel safe walking these streets at night right now."

Edited 2021-06-30 13:07 (UTC)

Jesse's eyebrows went up quite a whiles, there.

"So... what'd he do to piss you off?"

"He licked me," said Summer, with the firm certainty that that was all anyone needed to know in this situation, any further details were unsubstantial and inconsquential, and that honestly? Punching was too good for him in this situation.

Jesse reached for her beer.

"Seriously?" she said. "Ew."

"Yeah," said Summer firmly, then rolled her eyes. "Apparently, he's super into this whole 'people taste like things' thing today, but not so much into consent. I already warned him, though, if he even thinks about licking any customers without express permission, he is definitely getting locked in the back room again."

Considering how often she locked him in there, this was absolutely not an empty threat, either.

"Wait, people taste like things today?"

Points for being anti-social, Faden.

"Yeah," said Summer, who then held out the back of her hand toward Jesse, "see for yourself."

Tino licking her was one thing; Jesse licking her was a different thing all together.

"I literally taste exactly like the strawberry lemonade jello shot, only if I was way worse about balancing the alcohol content."

She was also way more sour than the shot, too, but that didn't kick in until after the initial sweetness.

"So weird," Jesse commented out loud.

...Should I do it? Damn it, now that she's said it, I want to know!

"If you're sure," she said, leaning forward.

"Trust me," said Summer, leaving her hand hovering there. "I've been licked by way worse before."

TINO.

(Although, to be fair, that statement would have been true even if he hadn't licked her, but the fact that he had just made it, like, super true, because she was pretty sure he was the worst thing she'd been licked by thus far, and that was saying a lot).

"Okay. Here goes."

Definitely the weirdest thing I've done in, like, a year.

She leaned over and licked the back of Summer's hand. Quickly.

"...Huh."

"Riiiiiiight?" said Summer, almost looking proud of herself as if she had done anything to make herself taste like that. "It's weird, isn't it? But also kind of cool?"

She considered Jesse with a tilt of her head before saying, "Ohmygod, if you taste like just a generic beer, I will totally die."

Which now meant she was considering what the least awkward way to ask your friend if you could lick her to see if she tasted like beer might be.

"It like, seriously tastes like you spent the past four hours swimming through a pool of strawberry jello," Jesse said, leaning back. "And then someone dumped a barrel of vodka on you."

"I mean," said Summer, "that does sound a like a helluva way to spend an afternoon, but, unfortunately, mine was spent more being covered in donuts and other people's sweat instead."

Which was also not much of a complaint, surprisingly.

Short pause.

(Jesse was wondering what she tasted like, right now, herself.)

"Do I want to know?"

How could she not wonder? Summer herself was dying to find out what Jesse tasted like, but was sort of keeping an eye out for the right moment to try and find out, because sometimes, you just couldn't go in taste-buds ablazing at full force, especially, she felt, not with Jesse.

So she just grinned a little, cocked her head toward the park. "The Wednesday activity. We did the thing where you have to pass something long to the people on your team but you have to only use your chin and your neck and stuff. I guess that new donut place was sponsoring it, though, so instead of doing, like, oranges or balloons or something....it was donuts.

"It was," she added, somewhat needlessly, "a mess."

And that wasn't even mentioning the donuts that exploded, either!

Hey now. Sometimes Jesse was up for some weird stuff!

... By her own definition of weird. Who knew how that would fall out here.

"So icing everywhere," Jesse said. "Did you get tempted to just eat the donuts?"

Yeah, Summer wasn't even sure where this fell on the weird spectrum for herself yet, either.

"Not really?" she admitted with a shrug. "I mean, they looked good and everything, but there's also too much of a good thing and there were a lot of donuts, and they kind of lose their appeal when smeared over...some people."

A slight pause.

"Although there's a few where the situation definitely enhanced the appeal, not gonna lie, but I think it generally reached asort of...equalibrim?"

"Like a donut neutral zone," Jesse said.

If she just stealthily lifted her own hand to her face like that, maybe Summer wouldn't notice her licking it?

Summer was sort of on the look-out for such a manuever right now, since Jesse had apparently not been aware of the whole phenomena yet, so, yeah, she was definitely going to notice.

Whether or not she'd say anything, well...

"Exactly," said Summer. "And honestly? I think most people were too concerned about whether or not their donuts would explode to care too much about eating them anyway."

Jesse swiped her tongue over the back of her hand very quickly.

There. Super-stealthy! And...

Huh.

"Explode, huh?" she asked, distractedly.

"You wouldn't happen to know any actors or out-of-work mobsters who can pretend to be actors, would you?" Lucifer asked, sinking down into a seat.

"I mean," said Summer, "most of them are non-human, but I can get you a contact list, if you want."

It definitely gave her head a tilt as Lucifer settled on and she just went ahead and lined up the jello shots for him.

"What's the occasion?"

"I finally finished my grand plan to get my revenge on Daniel," Lucifer said, "who shot me, now I'm just exploring potential flourishes to really make this a work of art."

"With you behind it, Lucifer, dear," said Summer, with a saccharinity in her smile and her fluttering eyelashes that made it impossible to tell if she was being sincere or mocking (or both, there was a good chance it was both), "how could it be anything but art? But, follow up questions: who is Daniel, why did he shoot you, and how else can I help?"

"The Detective's formerly-and-now-once-again-douchey ex," Lucifer said, picking up a shot without looking at it, "And apparently he saw my Devil face and thought that was reason enough to shoot me on my therapist's lawn."

Summer felt like there were a few more follow-up questions to be had there, but the one that really seemed to stick with her, after a moment of considering a few directions for the conversation was, "Is the therapist's lawn part of this particularly significant in any way?"

Hey, you never knew. The location didn't seem like that substantial enough of a detail to mention, but since he did...

"Well, it was in the middle of a residential neighborhood in front of my brother and both of my partners while my therapist passed out on the sofa," Lucifer said, slammed back the shot, and said, "But otherwise, no."

"Was this, like, in the middle of the day?" asked Summer. "Or nighttime? Late morning after a really wild night?"

Look, she was just trying to finish painting the picture Lucifer had started, here.

"Night," Lucifer said, folding his hands as he continued to fill in those details. "Octavia and I had wasted most of our evening on Amenadiel's screaming offspring, Dr. Linda had whisked Duke off to Girls' Night, which was also apparently a sting. The Detective ran away after the sting to come talk to me and they followed in pursuit, only to find Daniel there with his bloody gun."

"Awwww," said Summer, "so you did go see your nephew!"

Because, yeah, that was going to be her biggest take-away from that, smiling almost fondly at Lucifer (or, rather, his presumed distain for the little guy) over it.

"That all sounds very complicated, though," she added, going ahead and pouring a whiskey she figured would be needed once those shots were worked through, "but at least you weren't bored. I assume you're okay from the shot, though?"

"That's the strange thing," Lucifer said. He picked up the next shot, because yeah, he was going to go through these pretty quickly. "Normally I'm vulnerable when I'm around the Detective, so that shot really should have killed me."

"I mean," said Summer, "this is the printer," was it a printer? Fax machine? Summer couldn't really remember the deets all that well, just that it was definitely some kind of office equipment as a gift, "Detective, right? The one you had a whole," she gestured vaguely in the air with a roll of her eyes, "with? I know they say absence makes the heart grow fonder, but, maybe in this case, it makes the heart grow less vulnerable to douche bullets?"

"Perhaps," Lucifer said. He wasn't as concerned about all that as Duke had been.

Down went the next shot. "Frankly I'm just glad I can visit Los Angeles without worrying about being perforated now."

"That definitely is an added benefit," Summer agreed, "although, not gonna lie, kind of a bummer that didn't happen weekend before last. I think someone getting shot was definitely a missed opportunity for my birthday party."

As if she would have remembered it that late in the night, but still!

There was always next year, perhaps.

And there went the third shot.

"Yes, well, either way Duke and Octavia would have wound up being weird about it," he said, "And that would certainly have ruined your party."

"Yeah, I don't think anything could have ruined that party," Summer informed him with certainty. Especially not something like Duke and Octavia being weird about things, especially considering Octavia was pretty weird about things in general as it was.

Sorry not sorry.

"I've had parties rip the entire fabric of time and space, Luce, I don't think someone getting shot is going to cause that much of a blip. If anything, it would just give everyone more to talk about."

Which was a hallmark of a good party, obviously.

"Ehn," Lucifer said.

You know? That bacon bourbon shot? It worked somehow.

"I suppose Duke was at least equally drunk that night. The second time I've had to carry him home that week."

"Hey," Summer said, "at least he made it to the end! Not everyone did!"

Sorry, Annie!

"And," Summer added, in almost that same sweet, almost fawning, tone from earlier, because she just couldn't help it, "at least he had such a nice, strong, handsome devil such as yourself around to help take care of him."

"I am quite nice, strong and handsome, yes," Lucifer preened, because he couldn't not, "And I suppose at least he didn't pass out over my blood this time."

Go and lick each other somewhere slightly more private.

But still not that private, you guys, come on now.

Season 5 is bonkers so far, y'all.

Tino absolutely tastes like an ashtray. Even if he doesn't smoke.

Write it up. Confirmed canon now.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Caritas; Wednesday [06/30].

The Stage - 06/30.

The Bar - 06/30.

Re: The Bar - 06/30.

Re: The Bar - 06/30.

Re: The Bar - 06/30.

Re: The Bar - 06/30.

Re: The Bar - 06/30.

Re: The Bar - 06/30.

Re: The Bar - 06/30.

Re: The Bar - 06/30.

Re: The Bar - 06/30.

Re: The Bar - 06/30.

Re: The Bar - 06/30.

Re: The Bar - 06/30.

Re: The Bar - 06/30.

Re: The Bar - 06/30.

Re: The Bar - 06/30.

Re: The Bar - 06/30.

Re: The Bar - 06/30.

Re: The Bar - 06/30.

Re: The Bar - 06/30.

Re: The Bar - 06/30.

Re: The Bar - 06/30.

Re: The Bar - 06/30.

Re: The Bar - 06/30.

Re: The Bar - 06/30.

Re: The Bar - 06/30.

Re: The Bar - 06/30.

Re: The Bar - 06/30.

Re: The Bar - 06/30.

Re: The Bar - 06/30.

Re: The Bar - 06/30.

Re: The Bar - 06/30.

Re: The Bar - 06/30.

Re: The Bar - 06/30.

Re: The Bar - 06/30.

Re: The Bar - 06/30.

Re: The Bar - 06/30.

Re: The Bar - 06/30.

Re: The Bar - 06/30.

Re: The Bar - 06/30.

Re: The Bar - 06/30.

The Lounge - 06/30.

OOC - 06/30.

Re: OOC - 06/30.

Re: OOC - 06/30.