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The Perk, Thursday Morning

"I swear I'm going to fucking murder the next person to complain about me about some stupid website nerd bullshit," Margo growled as she waited at the counter for her heavily-caffeinated drink.

The barista was silent. He had been here before.

"All I said was 'don't put some hippie flower shit on my website'," she continued, "And suddenly I'm 'being too demanding' and they're 'swamped with work anyway'. Customer service just isn't what it used to be."

The barista kept pouring.

"I mean, in the nerd biz," she amended, letting her hand drop. "You guys are fine."

A sudden sigh of relief tore through the entire Perk.

Margo pretended she didn't hear it.

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Ulysses stumbled in somewhere in the middle of that - and immediately considered just backing right the fuck out again.

But unfortunately for him, his place was all out of coffee and he really really needed coffee, so.

He was stuck in line here, now.

"Ugh," Margo groaned, and threw half a glance over her shoulder at the new guy. "Oh, hey, flaily nerdboy."

Ulysses couldn't help the way his face pulled a little with indignance at that descriptor.

And yet:

"... Hi."

"What are we freaking out about this time," Margo said, turning back to look at the barista.

"Uh, I'm -- just coffee," Ulysses said, maybe wincing a little at his own stuttering. "Just getting coffee, Margo, that's all."

Margo probably shouldn't torture the poor guy.

"You're not very good at this, are you."

But she'd had an annoying morning and she didn't have anywhere else to be.

Ulysses would very much prefer not being tortured, yes!

"I'm -- literally just trying to get my coffee and go."

"Talking to me," Margo clarified. "Don't worry. A lot of people aren't," she added, sugary-sweet.

She was still looking at the barista.

And Ulysses was looking at her --

Well. The narrative wanted to say 'back', but, uh. His gaze had at some point here slid just slightly lower than that. Somehow.

(Wait, what?)

"Uh huh," he replied, eloquently.

Margo could be charitable and assume he was staring at the top of the ornate M-tattoo on the middle of her back, currently half on show thanks to her low-cut dress.

But. She knew she had a nice ass.

"What's your order?" she asked, lightly.

It would be very kind of her to be charitable, though he had also clocked the tattoo.

(Look, his Grindr adventures hadn't amounted to much, of late, and maybe the slump was starting to show.

... That, and his inbuilt compass always trying to guide him towards the dangerous and ill-advised.)

"Um." A beat. "Like, just an Americano and a bagel."

Margo made a big show of looking over her shoulder to consider him. "Get him an Americano and one of those bagels full of chocolate sprinkles or whatever it is you serve to the youth these days," she said.

That was absolutely a 'cat playing with a canary' smile.

"I was gonna go for a cr--" Ulysses started, but quickly amended it to, "You know what, it's fine."

A beat.

"Thanks?"

"You're welcome," Margo said. Somehow, she sounded both bright and sultry at the same time, her expression amused and eye big.

A beat went by.

"Thanks."

Oh, he'd said that already. Oh, he did not trust any of this even a little bit.

... Oh, he should probably say something else.

"So how's... how've you been?"

"Well, Ulysses," said Margo, who paid attention to names all of the time and pretended not to know them about half of the time anyway, "Website designers are a bunch of entitled jackasses, but on the other hand, I'm still fabulous, and I'm getting a great coffee, so if I get one more positive today, I'm going to chalk it up as a win."

There was a fair bit of 'oh no/oh yes' going down Uly's spine when she said his name. Jesus, he needed to get his shit together.

"Yeah, I think everyone here kinda got that about the... website people," he said, brushing unruly curls back from his face. "So uh, I think I speak for everyone when I say it's good the rest is -- good."

"And how have you been?" Margo purred, with a little shimmy of her hips before she turned back to the counter.

Was he adorable or just pathetic? She wasn't quite sure.

His own assessment would have trended towards the pathetic, in all honesty.

He was trying not to look at her hips.

"Not much going on," Ulysses said, a few fingers still tangled in the curls. A nervous tic. "But the island hasn't tried to kill me in a while, so I guess it's a good day."

"You don't really have much in the way of standards, do you, Ulysses?" Margo asked.

She took her drink from the barista. And then his drink.

She half-turned back towards him and held out the Americano in question.

The offended scrunched-up face of 'flaily nerdboy' fame was back.

"I have standards," Ulysses said, even as he reached for the Americano. "It's not my fault nothing much happens in this town, but when it does, it's dramatic."

Edited 2022-07-28 12:25 (UTC)

"I'm just saying my idea of a good day includes at least a good screw or a rocking massage," Margo said, with a casual wave of her drink. "But hey, you do you."

Now, Ulysses was kind of terrified of her in a complicated way, but that wasn't going to stop him from asking, "Didn't you just say this day was almost a win because of coffee?"

"Going to chalk it up as a win against the bullshit I had to deal with this morning," Margo said, rolling her... eye. "Fuck. Though now I think I'm just gonna swing by the spa instead of opening up shop."

"There's a spa here?"

"Yeah, Theodoric's," Margo said, raising an eyebrow. "When's the last time you left your house for anything but coffee?"

She was definitely developing an... idea of how Ulysses lived.

He left the house for another stimulant far more often than for coffee, actually. But otherwise, yeah, fair.

Ulysses frowned into the middle distance for a second, trying to place the name. Then his eyebrows went up again. "Wait, between the sex shop and and groceries, right?" he said. "Yeah I didn't think that, like. Counted."

"It's a spa. They do your nails and rub your back real nice," Margo said, rolling her eye. She took a sip of her coffee. "It counts."

"It doesn't LA count."

Look, Carly had dragged him places and now this was something where he apparently did have standards?

"Fuck you, I'm from LA," Margo said casually.

And there went Uly's head, tilting a comical amount as his brow knit together in confusion.

"I -- wait, you are?"

"Yeah. Don't be a poser," Margo told him, rolling her eye. "You're going to make us all look bad."

"Me?"

That was pretty indignant for someone who technically wasn't even from LA.

"I don't see anyone else in this joint turning down spa time 'because LA'," Margo said dryly, putting her hand on her hip.

"Yeah because they barely have a spa, here."

Look. Look, just blame Carly, okay? He barely cared about spas in the first place.

"You didn't even know where it is," Margo said dryly.

"... Yeah, because it's barely there?"

Well, the one good thing about this was Ulysses was clearly forgetting to be terrified of her.

"Honey," Margo said.

How could one word sound so withering?

"You want to get a Big Mac, you go to the 6-foot-tall golden arches," she rasped. "You want good cuisine, you go to the place that doesn't have to advertise."

Her gaze dipped down along his outfit. Making a point, without saying it.

"Shoo back to Mickey D's."

Ulysses could tell she was taking a jab at insulting him, yes. But the metaphor didn't really land for him, and dragging his clothes into it at random, well.

No one wore this shit without it being a choice, and he'd had to learn to go without wide outside approval a long time ago.

So.

"... You are weirdly attached to this small-town spa." Maybe the fear was still in the choice not to say 'defensive over', instead. "It almost makes it worth trying, I don't know."

She didn't give a flying shit about Theodoric's. She just didn't like her authority being threatened.

So Margo just held up her hand and gestured at him to shoo. She'd told him to, hadn't she?

Ulysses made a questioning gesture with his free hand in return.

"What?"

"Shoo," Margo said. Helpfully.

Ulysses --

Stepped past her, up to the counter. "Yeah, hi, uh," he said. "She can keep the... chocolate sprinkle whatever. I'll just take a cream cheese bagel?"

A beat.

"To go, please."

The barista started in the direction of the bagels, the chocolate sprinkle one still in hand.

Margo held up her hand.

The barista froze in place.

"Shoo," she said.

Margo, that was just petty.

Ulysses turned to look at her. "Seriously?"

Jon missed the rant, but not Margo. Fortunately? Unfortunately? One of those.

He nodded to her as he came up to the counter. "Um. Hello, Margo."

What was it, nerd hour?

"What is it, nerd hour?" Margo asked.

"Wh..." Jon hastily cut off his question. "I'm not sure what you mean."

"Never mind," Margo said dryly. "Just a lot of you coming out of the woodwork all at once. Guess the caffeine just calls you."

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The Perk, Thursday Morning

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