fandomtownies | Wednesday: Late Morning

Entry tags:

Wednesday: Late Morning - The Onsen

Nell and Liliana had settled on a very late morning time to meet, which had given Nell more than enough time to get through her morning workout and chores, leaving her with the rest of the day to relax.

Or indulge.

The Onsen was the perfect start of that (and honestly all Nell really needed). Time with Liliana and a nice lunch afterwards would make a perfect day.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

"You are very much going to enjoy our last class," Liliana said, sliding into the hot water of the onsen with a pleased sigh. "Honestly, with as close as this is to my house, I do not visit this enough."

"Oh, is that a hint?" Nell said with a smile. "If so, yes, I'm sure I'll enjoy it a great deal "

She sighed, eye closed in contentment, as she let her body relax into the heated water. "I do love this."

"I'll tell you one thing, Nell darling, it's not going to be the onsen. More than that, though, you'll have to wait." Listen. Liliana wasn't the Left Hand of Oona for no reason. Sometimes she very much enjoyed riddles.

Not as much as she enjoyed luxuriating in warmth and comfort, however. "It's glorious. Some time you should come see my bathtub. The good one." It wasn't a hot tub, but it wasn't not a hot tub either. "Though I hear you're getting something similar for yourself?"

"Hmmm," Nell said considering. "Then I'll just have to imagine and wait."

Then her eyes sparkled and she couldn't help her smile. "Yes, our own hot tub," she said. "It will be amazing to have our very own!"

"Where do you intend to put it? Will you be turning your guest room into a second bathroom?" Wise choice. To Liliana's mind, baths were generally better than guests.

"Ideally we'd love for it to be on the roof where we can sit in it at night and watch the stars," Nell said. "It would be wonderful to be able to enjoy the outside as we soak."

"An excellent choice," Liliana said. "I have always loved stargazing." There was a small, fond smile on her lips, though a bit of wistfulness in her eyes. "Is that just for the two of you? Or will guests be allowed to join sometimes?"

"I think there will probably be room for a guest or two," Nell said, "and you can certainly come sit in it with me."

"Excellent, we can leave Ignis and Gladio arguing over Cup Noodle^TM and take a little girl time," Liliana said. And then gazed over to Nell with a small grin. "Now, if I do remember correctly, I was told you had stories to share? Shaaaaaare, darling."

"Seems like you already know the main one," Nell said with a smile. "I've learned that soaking in a hot tub is both self care and an indulgence that I didn't feel guilty about "

"Good," Liliana said, beaming at Nell. "Guilt is a useless emotion, put there by people who want to control you. I love seeing you removing some of yours. Such things are unworthy of you, little woods witch. Have you figured out why soaking in a hot tub doesn't make you feel guilty?"

"Well, to start with it's useful," Nell said. "After a long day's work it's good to soak in the tub. My muscles aren't as sore and I feel relaxed and refreshed, so it's good self care. And it's a nice thing to do with Gladio."

She closed her eyes and just enjoyed the water for a moment. "It also just makes me happy. And if my work is all done, why not indulge in some time just for me."

"You know I won't argue with that kind of thinking, darling." Other than the concept of 'a long day's work,' of course. Liliana was very lazy, especially about anything she didn't particularly care about, which was most things work-related. "The idea that you should work yourself into an early grave baffles me. Life is meant to be enjoyed. I should know."

"When I was back home I had to work that hard if I wanted to survive," Nell said. "Especially after John died. The only money I had was what little I could make from my plants and teas and lotions at the little farmer's market. Barely enough to get by."

Liliana nodded. "Indeed. And that created the link in your mind, work or starve," she said. "And, even now when that's not the case, it's hard to turn those little mental programs off." She wrinkled her nose. "They do their best to linger, especially those formed as you are."

"Formed as I am," Nell asked curiously. "Oh. You mean because of how I was raised?"

It had been a hard life, very hard, but not a bad one.

"I suppose if you're always worried about what the winter will bring and if you'll make it through, that it never really goes away."

Liliana nodded. "The lessons you learn while young are the deepest and hardest to get rid of," she said. "Because they help form and shape who you are."

Incredibly rude of them.

"They made me who I am and that's not a bad thing." She was quiet for a moment, letting her legs float up. "There are things I have to deal with, things I want to change, but most of me is good."

She was quiet for another moment. "I'm reading a book, you know. About... about children raised in a cult. ... It's hard to read and hard to think about."

"Oh yes, but...you should always be thinking of the things that help you and the things that hurt you and work on ridding yourself of those things that hurt," Liliana said, floating in the water with her face to the sky. "I'm sure you were taught many things and have been actively pruning them as you live here."

A pause, followed by a slow nod. "Too familiar?"

Nell nodded. "It's hard to look at and think about. The things that I just took as part of life. I thought I knew a lot about how bad things were, but there is so much more underneath that's affected me in ways I am just starting to understand.

Her toes stretched and pointed towards the sky. "I can only read a little bit at a time."

"Do you do something kind for yourself afterwards?" Liliana asked softly. "Because you are doing something very hard on yourself."

"I go put my hands in the soil of Soulwood," Nell said. "It soothes me. But I never thought of doing something kind for myself. Except maybe be with Gladio and the cats."

"Think of it this way, darling," Liliana said, sitting up while the water streamed over her shoulders and back. "You are hurting yourself - for good reason and ultimately for your benefit, but still hurting. You hurt yourself, then you comfort yourself, and then you do something kind for yourself. You deserve kindness as much as you would give to anyone else."

Nell let her hands float through the water, watching them move. "I hadn't thought of it that way. You're right, of course. I'd be kind to anyone else."

Liliana preened a little at the 'of course.' Because of course of course! "Exactly," she said. "I know I cannot convince you to be kinder to yourself than you would be to anyone else, but at the very least, you should be as kind, darling."

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject