fandomtownies | Turtle & Canary; Sunday [1/6]

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Turtle & Canary; Sunday [1/6]

Having had a chance to glance at a calendar at some point in the past couple days, Doctor Doom realized full well that it was now only 2008, mere weeks after Victor von Doom left Fandom even though he had lived a full year and mere weeks in that time. This annoyed Doom, for he was still a junior. It meant that Doom likely still had his job at Wexler's store, though. While he didn't particularly care about gainful employment, it did give him access to things that he would otherwise have to ask someone else for.

And that's how he special ordered a throne for his dorm room.

Today's Squishy flavors: Doom, Doomberry, Grape Doom

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Apu is totally envious of Doom's armor.

He very likely will not attempt to kill you, but only because that would interfere with his plans.

New Kid Week was always a busy one, and so Turtle was busy, and had a lot of work to do, especially with a new employee coming in. She'd saved a nice slice of time today to go work on some paperwork in the back, and she figured it probably wouldn't hurt to see how Victor's holidays had gone.

"Hey, Vic--whoa." She blinked. "Time slip again? Did we just fastforward to Halloween for the weekend and I just haven't noticed yet?"

"It appears I have lived more than a year over the course of the past two weeks of time in Fandom," Doom explained succinctly. "And in that time, Victor von Doom has passed on to make way for DOCTOR DOOM. As the name 'Victor' no longer applies to me, you will address me as 'Doctor,' 'Doom,' 'Your highness,' or any such similar titles from this point forth."

Turtle, with a skeptical sort of arch of her eyebrow, just sort of stared at Victor for a while. Well, he certainly did seem taller, so that was something, and the whole more than a year thing she could buy, but...

"...Seriously?"

"It has been an eventful year," Doom stated.

"I guess so," Turtle commented back, giving Victor another careful look. "This isn't going to effect your performance as a good employee, now, is it, Victor?"

"Doom," Doom said. "I do not wish to correct your usage of my name again."

"As for my job performance, you will see no difference in my ability to do this job. It is useful toward certain goals and therefore keeps my interest for the time being."

Turtle liked Victor better.

She nodded. "Good to hear. I'd just maybe watch that cape around Liz; she's taken to chewing on things a lot lately. I'll be in the back room; got some stuff to work on. If anyone calls about a baby grand piano, let me know?"

"Reprogramming the dog to leave the cape alone is of no consequence to Doom," Doom said. "And perhaps her security capabilities would be improved with the addition of laser weaponry..."

Doom began making a list of changes to Liz in his mind, up to and including secretly reprogramming her to be loyal only to Doom. He likely wouldn't do any of this, but it kept his mind busy and that was probably a good thing.

"Bob's already got lasers," Turtle said, frowning slightly. "Too many lasers will make customers feel like they aren't trusted, and people don't like to feel mistrusted. It could hurt business, Victor."

"Doom," Doom corrected again. "And they would be hidden lasers, of course, only revealed just before use. That way the customer will still feel trusted while the store is ready for any attack or attempt at shoplifting."

If lasers were getting this kind of resistance, he wasn't going to bring up mini-rockets.

Turtle eyed Victor carefully. "...Maybe," she said. "Just as long as they're hidden and you don't mess with her friendliness programming."

"Agreed," Doom said. "But I will not touch her unless she touches my cape. Up until that point, she is of little interest to Doom."

Little did he know that the little robot dog was already making eyes at it as they spoke.

Turtle nodded again. "Good. Well, I'll let you get back to work then, Victor."

"It is Doctor Doom, not Victor," Doom said, his patience wearing thin.

This whole 'not destroying everyone in the name of not being forced to leave town before the completion of his goals' thing was going to be tough.

Hoshi needed to stock up on supplies of the 21st century variety. She preferred to avoid Turtle and Canary on Sundays because of that rude guy that worked there, but classes started tomorrow and she was running short on time. Besides, Apu wouldn't give her a problem.

So Hoshi walked in, trying to remember the Hindi word for "pencil" when she caught sight of someone in a cape. "Victor?" she asked tentatively.

"Victor von Doom is a relic of the past," Doom answered. "I am now DOCTOR DOOM."

"What happened to you?" asked Hoshi, taking a good look at the mask and armor.

"Many things, most of them far beyond the ability of anyone on this island to understand," Doom said. "My return to this place is but a brief stop in achieving my greater destiny."

"Brief stop? So you're not staying for the rest of the semester?" asked Hoshi.

"Your scope is far too limited," Doom scoffed. "My destiny will take years to achieve. 'Brief' refers to however long it takes to achieve what I must here. Two weeks, six months, a year... NOTHING compared to the timeline I have in mind."

Hoshi couldn't stop staring at the mask. "What are you supposed to achieve? And why are you dressed like that?"

"Neither answer is yours to know," Doom said. "Just know that it is DOOM who stands before you and be honored that you are one of the first in this place to meet him as he now is."

"I think I liked you better the way you were before," said Hoshi.

"Bah. You are not one of my subjects. It matters little to me what your opinion of Doom is," Doom said.

"Your subjects?" asked Hoshi. "It's nice to see that someone matters to you. Nice seeing you again, Doomie." She walked off, asking Apu in Hindi what kind of loose-leaf tea was in stock.

Sokka walked in for a Squishy and stopped and stared.

He wasn't sure which was weirder -- the creepy guy wearing creepy armor behind the counter, or...

"Whoa. Déjà vu."

"What do you want, Sokka?" Doom asked.

Sokka stared. He suddenly knew that was Victor von Doom under the creepy getup, but wasn't sure how... "von Doom?" he asked, cocking his head. "Have you worn that silly outfit before?"

"Only for the past several months," Doom declared. "Not that you have any way of knowing that."

"Nooooooo..." Sokka corrected. "You weren't wearing it in class two weeks ago. But... I think I've seen it before? It looks ridiculous, by the way. CREEPY, but ridiculous."

"Time is relative, Sokka," Doom explained. "But I don't expect you to comprehend such a concept."

"Oh, you're a future version of von Doom," Sokka said, immediately proving Doom wrong. "Does everybody wear silly-looking armor in the future?"

"Your ignorance of the specifics of my situation continues to amuse," Doom laughed. "I share this information only because of that amusement. I am advanced a year since you last saw me, but I am actually from the past. Your assessment was closer than I would have expected from you."

"...Wait, so I knew exactly what you were talking about, but you're calling me stupid anyway? How is THAT fair?"

Seeing as how this conversation could only get worse, Sokka headed for Bob to get a Doom-flavored Squishy. "...You haven't poisoned these, or anything, have you?"

"Little in life is fair," Doom said. "That is a lesson I've learned many times during my life and I've risen above it."

"With that in mind, it must be asked... What would Doom gain from poisoning the Squishies?" The answer was nothing. Doom was just messing with Sokka on this point.

Sokka facepalmed and took a large gulp of his Squishy. "You're not SERIOUSLY talking about yourself in the third person, are you?"

"Do you actually think your criticism means anything to Doom?" Doom inquired. "I have grown beyond humanity. Your opinion of my eschewing pronouns means nothing."

"Then you probably don't want to hear my opinion of your sanity, either. Just... Please tell me you haven't gone evil?"

He remembered who he was talking to. "...I mean, more evil?"

"That depends on your definition of evil," Doom said. "I lead a revolution to depose a cruel tyrant who had done his best to destroy my tribe during my absence. Is that evil?"

Sokka gaped at von Doom with wide eyes. "No, that's... Wow... That's really heroic, actually. I wouldn't have expected that of you. No offense, but you seem a lot more like an evil megalomaniac."

"You presume that you could offend me," Doom scoffed. "After all of my experiences over the past year, the only opinions that matter to me are those of my subjects."

When I first signed Victor up for this job, I knew this day would come. I am gleeful for it.

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Turtle & Canary; Sunday [1/6]

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OOC