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Caritas | Wednesday

Hannibal was experimenting. He'd brought a toaster from his room into the bar and was now trying to cook Hot Pockets all the way through. And who was testing these Hot Pockets out? Tino, of course. Hannibal gave him some cock and bull story about them being gourmet and a total girl attractor and Tino, being Tino, believed him.

Right now, Hannibal was on his fifth Hot Pocket and Tino was beginning to realize that everything about Hot Pockets was fake and gross.

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"Hey, you're the one calling me demanding and annoying," he teased, shaking his head. "I'm so under appreciated."

"No you're not," she said. "And you know that too."

"Stop talking like you're me," he chided lightly. "You're not as awesome as I am."

"Of course I'm not." Beat. "I'm way more awesome than you are. 'Sides, you obviously need someone talking to you like they're you."

"No one can be me," he said, shaking his head. "I'm often imitated but never duplicated. You can keep trying but you're never gonna get close. Babe."

"Jesus, as if I would actually want to be you, babe," Kate snorted. "No offence."

"You would and you know it," he insisted. "Denying it, that's cute, but you do."

She gave him a look and a raised eyebrow. "Why?"

"Why?" Hannibal repeated, raising an eyebrow. "That answer's right in front of you. Look at me. That's why."

"What do you mean look at you? Look at me! Why would I want to trade all this--" And here she gestured vaguely at herself, before waving a hand in his general direction. "--for that?"

"Because you're smart," he said and smirked. "That's why."

"I don't think that would be smart at all," Kate replied, shaking her head. "But, whatever. If we keep talking about this the island might just do something about it."

"Well fine, we can both stay as we are and continue on about our awesome ways," he decided, reaching a hand out to shake hers. "Deal?"

"Deal," she agreed, shaking his hand. "So, when's your shift end? I was kinda hoping to walk you home."

"Awww. It can end whenever I want," he said, glancing over at Tino who was still looking a little green. "I think Tino would almost welcome me getting out of here now. I'll stop making him eat Hot Pockets."

"Why does he do that, anyway?" Kate asked, momentarily distracted, and glancing over at Tino. "I mean, why does he listen to you?"

"I dunno," he answered, glancing at Tino himself and shrugging. "He just does. Not my fault he does."

Tino scowled and walked to the other end of the bar. Hannibal smirked and cleaned up his toaster and mess of Hot Pockets.

Meanwhile, Kate finished off the rest of her Coke. "What a weird guy."

"Don't let him hear you say that, he'll take it as flirting and ask you out." Poor Tino, so abused. "Ready to go?"

She nodded. "Yup. Completely ready to go."

"Onward then!" Hannibal pronounced, coming around from behind the bar and grasping her hand so they could take off.

Tino had never been so thankful to be alone.

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Caritas | Wednesday

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