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Caritas- Sunday

It wasn't that Hayley was really working tonight. She was just feeling terrible about the weekend, which wasn't really that different from how she felt any given day anymore, except that she'd woken up with some strange guy, she was even further from her daughter than she normally was, she didn't know where she was and couldn't call home without her phone. So, she'd gone for a drink.

And then the guy behind the bar had called her Kitty (which... was that supposed to be some werewolf crack? She had no idea) and generally been annoying, and then at one point he'd started to sing...

Long story short, it'd been a while since Hayley had fed, so Tino was now laying all crumpled with two holes in his neck in the corner behind the bar, out of sight, and Hayley was sitting behind the bar with her feet up on the counter and a glass of bourbon in hand. She might even get you a drink if you asked nicely.

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There are zombies. Okay, sure, why not.

Okay, FINALLY! Juliet had been all over this stupid town and had been just about to call it totally zombie-free, when she stopped in at the bar -- to check for zombies! She didn't drink, okay!?? -- and spotted the zombies on stage.

"There you are," she said, gritting her teeth and revving her chainsaw. "Suck on this, you zombified douchebags!"

She ran towards the stage, full speed, and lifted the chainsaw high over her head.

Shame about the non-violence spell.

Sure, the werewolf queen/vampire girl had just offed your bartender but that didn't mean you couldn't still be thirsty.

"Merry Christmas!" Jack enthused as he came through the bar door. "I have gifts for good little girls and boys -- and bad ones too."

He was a skeleton in a Santa suit, yes. Was there supposed to be something odd about that?

Hayley stared.

"Out of curiosity," she said, "are you supposed to be a skeleton in a Santa suit?"

"We're going to kidnap Sandy Claws so I can run Christmas this year!" Jack enthused. "It'll be fantastic."

He didn't react to the skeleton thing because he still wasn't sure why people kept making such a big deal out of it. Instead, he glanced over to the stage.

"Ah, what a nice band you have!"

"They're not mine." They just weren't trying to kill her, so she was fine with them. "You do know it's not Christmas yet, right?"

"I know, but we need time to prepare," Jack said. "Time to decorate, and make presents, and train reindeer, and bake mistletoe cookies, and all of that. And then --"

Here comes Santa Claus, here comes Santa Claus,
Right down Santa Claus lane
Vixen and Blitzen and all his reindeer
Pullin' on the reins
Bells are ringin', children singin'
All is merry and bright
Hang your stockings and say your prayers
'Cause Santa Claus comes tonight!

He beamed when he finished singing. He wasn't sure he'd meant to, but he liked it all the same.

Did she point out that Santa didn't exist? He seemed to be putting a lot of feeling into this whole thing.

"And what are you planning on doing with Santa during all this?" she asked, totally out of curiosity.

"We'll give him a nice vacation in Halloweentown," Jack informed her. "I'm sure he would love the break!"

Oh, Hayley's head hurt.

"You know what," she decided, "You go ahead and do you."

Jack tilted his head at her. "Thank you, I will," he said, as if she'd given him a compliment. "Now, what kind of drink should I get? I'll swallow about anything."

"No idea," Hayley admitted. "I don't work here."

She'd just killed the bartender, oops.

Jack frowned at her. "But you're behind the bar," he argued.

"I felt like it," she reasoned.

The beach wasn't doing him any favors so could anyone blame Jeremy for finding his way to a bar? No, he didn't think so. Maybe he'd find something good to drink inside.

He settled onto a stool and tapped his fingers against the counter. "What's good here?"

"Your guess is as good as mine," Hayley said, sipping her drink. "Bourbon's not bad."

"Let's go with that," Jeremy said, holding his breath on whether he was going to get carded or not. He tried to make himself look older than he was. Don't ask what he did. He just...yeah. "Two of them, in fact."

"Oh, I don't work here," Hayley said.

"You're behind the bar, though," Jeremy pointed out with a quick eyebrow raise. "That some new thing here? They let people just hang out and get their own drinks?"

Hayley shrugged. "The guy who was here... left."

Sort of. In the metaphysical sense.

"I decided to help myself."

"Huh."

Well then, he was going to do the same. Jeremy slipped off his stool and came around the counter without really asking. It seemed that if he wanted a drink, he'd have to get it himself.

"Wish I could get a job like that. Get paid to not even show up? Probably not an opportunity you'd get everyday."

He grabbed what looked like a clean glass and poured something into it.

Well, he'd showed up, it was just that he was dead behind the bar, and Hayley wasn't really bothered if anyone actually saw him.

"Or ever," Hayley agreed.

"You know where this place even is?" he asked her, leaning against the counter and taking a drink. It was really, really hard not to make a face but he managed. "I woke up on a frigging beach this morning. It's making me miss my stupid home, at least."

"No idea. Not missing home so much, though." Maybe. She missed Hope, and that was all she was willing to admit. "Where's your stupid home?"

"The beautiful and picturesque Mystic Falls, Virginia," Jeremy said sarcastically and took another drink. "Come for the scenery, stay for the death."

Dry. Oh so dry.

Hayley didn't say anything at first, but she was eyeing him super carefully, since um. She kind of shouldn't really go back there ever?

"Mystic Falls."

"It's in Virginia," he provided helpfully since he thought maybe the repetition was because she didn't know it. "Maybe you've heard of their lovely Founder's Day events where the entire town shows up to stroke each other's egos."

She'd been at one of those, which was why she was thinking the way she was: namely that she'd probably have to fight/kill him at some point because obviously he was here to cause trouble for her.

"What are you doing here?" she demanded.

Well, now. Jeremy turned towards her, glass halfway to his mouth and frowned.

"Having a drink," he said like it was the most obvious thing in the world. "What are you doing here?"

Since there were demands happening now, he figured he'd throw one of his own out.

"I was here first, and I don't want anything to do with Mystic Falls." Because, you know, she hadn't started her own problems there or anything, really. "You should go."

"No." Now, Jeremy was just going to be stubborn. "I don't want to go anywhere and since I'm staying, guess that means you'll have to deal with Mystic Falls."

"How about not?" Hayley said, heading out from the bar area to leave.

Have fun dealing with the dead guy!

"What did I do?"

Jeremy didn't even know who he was talking to since she was leaving. Was Mystic Falls a bad word now? Apparently so.

Fifteen minutes later, a sopping wet cheerleader dragged her sopping wet chainsaw and her sopping wet decapitated boyfriend back into Caritas.

"Oooookay," Juliet said, narrowing her eyes. She glanced over at the bartender. "Sooooo ... how exactly do I get around the creepy zombie forcefield that drops people into ponds when it's freaking mid-November?"

If she died of pneumonia, that would be such a total bummer. At least Nick was immune. (No lungs.)

You did what Hayley did and kill them outside. Though Kitty would have a bigger problem losing the zombies on Tuesday, probably, shh don't tell.

"What the hell are you doing?" Hayley asked.

Juliet gave the bartender a really odd glance for that. And then she waved the chainsaw. (The one that was covered in little cut-out hearts, yes.)

"Zombie hunter," she said. "I was trying to take care of the Grateful Undead over there. But I took a dip in a nearby pond instead. Does that happen a lot?"

"I just got here yesterday," Hayley shrugged. "But I do know most people don't walk around with chainsaws."

Or decapitated heads.

"I usually don't have it out," Juliet explained. "But I just fought this, like, epic battle at my school, 'cause of some emo douchebag wearing too much eyeliner trying to become an evil God or something. I really thought this place was going to be crawling with zombies, too."

She was super relieved it wasn't. And mayyyybe a little disappointed. It was nice putting all her training to work, okay?

"So, help me get rid of the band before they start an epidemic."

"They haven't done anything to piss me off except smell bad," Hayley said. "And they're chained to the stage."

And she didn't really care about getting involved with zombies in addition to werewolves, vampires and witches.

Juliet craned her neck and frowned. Someone, in her overenthusiasm at getting to hack-n-slash, had totally missed the chained-to-the-stage detail. Dad would be so pissed at her effing up basic tactics like that.

"Oopsie," she said. "So what are they? Like, mascots? Unpaid labor? Are zombie slaves a thing?"

Or you could get away from all that because um.

There was probably TV on?

Nine years in the game and this is the first time I've killed anyone outside of BDEs.

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Caritas- Sunday

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