Caritas; Wednesday [03/06].

[not_a_bird]

Well, tonight was the night Sweet Dee expected to throw her woefully unprepared students (and her honestly over-prepared self) on stage for some good old amatuer comedy! She probably should have given them a little more time, but the momentum from this idea had already been interrupted by a stupid trip to Iceland, she wasn't going to let it dwindle any further into the point where she likely forgot about or stopped caring. Even if maybe she could.

Look. It had taken three months to get to the point where she was taking kids to a bar (where they could actually drink anyway) instead of three weeks, and it was so they could perform and not to have them watch a really bad home-made sequel with some really questionable content (to her credit, though, she thought they were going to be screening Othello).

Anyway. It was the First Open Mic Comedy Night at Caritas! Come one, come all! It wasn't going to be a shitshow at all!

Comments

The Stage - 03/06.

[not_a_bird]

Sweet Dee and the Acting 101 class'll be expected to go first chronologically, but anyone's welcome to come up and give a go at the mic!

You don't even really have to do comedy. It would, you know, be nice, since that's kind of the whole idea, but no one's going to boot you off the stage, Sweet Dee doesn't get paid nearly enough for that shit.

Re: The Stage - 03/06.

[not_a_bird]

Sweet Dee's intention in going up first was not only to introduce the whole Open Mic night thing, but also the help ease the students into realizing just how easy and simple it could be! But, of course, once she got through with welcoming everyone and introducing what started it all, it appeared more like she was setting it up so that no matter how poorly the students did, they still weren't going to be nearly as bad as she was.

Unintentionally.

Okay. Here we go. Fidgeting with the hem of her shirt a little, Sweet Dee chuckled nervously and started in on her act [[ cw: kaitlin olson's all too realistic gagging action ]].

"So, you guys, what's the deal with those hands-free headsets? That everybody's wearing in their ears, right?"

Ahd there was the first hint of a gag. Not a joke gag, but...an actual dry-heave gag. Which echoed spectacularly on the mic.

But she shook her head and tried to forge on. "It's, like, 'hey, everybody! Look at me. I'm one part robot, and three parts asshole."

She'd barely gotten the punchline out before it was covered up in more dry heaving sounds.

But she just needed a moment. A deep breath. Shake her head and push through it.

"I mean, am I right or--"

Whatever else Sweet Dee was trying to say was just lost in a garbled gurgle of gagging to the point where she just nope right out of it all with a "Screw it!" and fled the stage to go back to the bar. She needed a drink to recover before going to ferry up her students if she had to.

It would have been nice to have said that this reaction was all because she was rusty and hadn't done an open mic night since she got here, but, nope. Nope. That would not be true.

At least it was short and dry this time.

Re: The Stage - 03/06.

[seriesofbaddecisions]

Sabine raised her hands and thought about clapping... and then decided, no. No she would not.

Re: The Stage - 03/06.

[always_someone]

Norman made his way up to the stage looking a little bit nervous, since... well... he hadn't really managed to prepare much, nevermind anything even funny.

But one of the zombies from the band looked at him and smiled (as best as a zombie was able), and before his turn he took a few minutes just chatting pleasantly with him. He was a pretty nice guy. Promised him that people were here to drink and whatever was happening on the stage was mostly just background noise anyway. You couldn't screw up too badly at a bar open mic, not really.

Norman bit his lip and smiled back. Sure, to everyone else in the room it probably just looked like he was being moaned and drooled at, but he appreciated the advice. And then asked the zombies if they knew any Jonathan Coulton, to which the guitarist chuckled and suggested the very song he had been thinking of, and...

Well. That was now Norman wound up getting on stage and doing a dramatic recitation of Re: Your Brains, backed by somewhat discordant, grumbling zombie band.

"Heya Tom, it's Bob, from the office down the hall
Good to see you buddy, how've you been?
Thing have been okay for me except that I'm a zombie now
I really wish you'd let us in
I think I speak for all of us when I say I understand
Why you folks might hesitate to submit to our demand
But here's an FYI: you're all gonna die screaming..."

The zombies, for what it was worth, were loving this.

Re: The Stage - 03/06.

[goldfishontherocks]

Keyleth didn't really get it, honestly, but corporate culture references weren't exactly the kind of thing the Ashari would be well versed in.

She was applauding anyway, if for no other reason than she felt it took a lot of guts to get up on that stage and Norman deserved acknowledgment for that.

Re: The Stage - 03/06.

[always_someone]

Oh, hey! Applause? Norman blinked up when he was done reciting lyrics (no-one's gonna eat your eyes!) and smiled crookedly before giving a little bow.

And then pausing a moment more to thank the zombies for being such a great help before making his way over to say hi.

"Hey, Keyleth." He grinned a little. "I hope that wasn't anything too weird."

Re: The Stage - 03/06.

[goldfishontherocks]

"It was, a little, but not because of you," Keyleth assured him. Or, well, tried to. "The zombies throw me a little bit, that's all. That was so cool though!"

Re: The Stage - 03/06.

[white_oleander]

Astrid wasn't sure what to expect with this whole thing from Norman, really, but she felt, once he got started, that she probably should have expected something like this out of Norman for this whole thing, and had to respect his use of the house band. And she cheered, hollering a little and clapping her hands, because they were in this together, whether they liked it or not, and she was more than happy to show him some encouragement for a job pretty well done.

Re: The Stage - 03/06.

[seriesofbaddecisions]

Sabine might not get the reference, but this was pretty much the most Norman thing ever. They were going to get applause and everything.

The zombies were included in that.

Re: The Stage - 03/06.

[white_oleander]

So, on the list of things she'd never exactly expected to do in her life, standing on a stage in a bar about to attempt a comedy routine wasn't even close to being on the list. But it couldn't be that bad, could it? It helped that Norman had gone already, and she didn't even know what that was from the teacher, but this couldn't be that bad. She just told herself to channel up all those times she wanted to be in the school Christmas pageants but Ingrid wouldn't allow it.

She smiled a little nervously into the mic, leaning forward as she started. "We're all familiar," she said, "with the phrase 'those who can't do, teach', right? So, if that's true, let's give it up for a moment for the undeniable truth that Ms. Reynolds must be the best teacher in the school."

Oh, yeah, she was expecting a semester's worth of fat stupid cow and ugly old hag roles for that one, but it would be worth it, especially considering she figured that's what she'd be assigned anyway.

"So, Fandom is a really interesting place to live and go to school. Even with everyone from so many different places, I really don't think there's anywhere else like it. Like, my roommate turned into a bird once. I was pretty new so I didn't realize it was her, and I tried to throw her out the window. What else are you going to do with a random bird in your room? Anywhere else, that would probably get you locked away, but around here, that's just Tuesday."

If she was a little more comfortable with what she was doing, Astrid may have paused a little just in case anyone did laugh, but, in case anyone didn't she was mostly just forging ahead with her materials.

"I still haven't turned into an animal yet--famous last words, right?--but I have been bitten by a gremlin. Anyone else? It's not really that bad; it didn't even really hurt. Well, except maybe my pride."

She mostly just had little bits and one liners, observational humor, but it was all she could really come up with. She realized it was a very Earth-centeric type of focus, too, but, hey, write what you know.

"You know, it took me a long time to figure out that this place really was just weird and that I wasn't slowly going crazy, but if you really think about it, it's still not that different than a normal school, if you ignore that we have all got to be way below the nation expected schooling hours. We have a power couple, only instead of it being the quarterback and the head cheerleader, it's an actual amplibious prince and a blue girl from space. We have homecoming court, only instead of the most popular or rich couple or whatever as King and Queen, it's...the kid who gets shot out of a cannon into walls and goes down waterfalls in barrels....and Paris."

Sorry, Paris.

Astrid tucked her hair behind her ears, wondering how long she needed to even do this for as she started to run out of or subsequently forget some of the other stuff she'd thought of. "Ummm, so, yeah, even though it's...really different, there's a lot about this place that can still feel familiar to, you know, just a regular time-traveler from California. It almost kind of grows on you, and the strangeness starts to feel more familiar, this place almost starts to become a little more like home..."

And a pause for that nice sentimental moment to settle.

"...but that could just be the Stokholm Syndrome talking. Good night, everybody!"

Ahh, nothing like ending on a good psychological disorder zinger! With that, she made her way very, very awkwardly off the stage.

...yeah, Astrid did not see a future career there.

Re: The Stage - 03/06.

[always_someone]

She'd been so good about applauding him, and Norman had really only stolen someone else's funny. Here she was with all kinds of observational humor (and a bit of a roast of the teacher, which Norman could respect too), and so of course he was going to cheer and applaud right back.

This place.

This place.

Re: The Stage - 03/06.

[seriesofbaddecisions]

Sabine did not expect to get a mention, and she was here for it. Literally and figuratively.

She was also getting applause, and Sabine actually liked the act.

Re: The Stage - 03/06.

[goldfishontherocks]

Once again, a lot of the references went way over Keyleth's head, but she applauded anyway. Since she was apparently here to be the moral support person, or something.

The Bar - 03/06.

[not_a_bird]

And when she's not up there gagging uncomfortably into a microphone, Sweet Dee is behind the bar slinging drinks.

And thinking it would be weird if one of her students wanted a beer or something. It wouldn't be the first time she'd served minors, of course, but it would be the first time she'd served minors legally, and that was just a head trip.

Re: The Bar - 03/06.

[always_someone]

Of all the things to make Norman even consider drinking...

...

"Can I have a Coke?"

...

He wasn't gonna start now. He didn't entirely trust the bartender.

Re: The Bar - 03/06.

[not_a_bird]

Sweet Dee considered trying to warn Norman that this might go a little better with an empty, dry stomach, but he'd also done pretty well even on the monologues at the beginning of the semester. He might actually be fine.

"One Coke it is," she said, procuring the drink for him and setting it in front of him. "Are you nervous at all, Norman?"

Re: The Bar - 03/06.

[always_someone]

"Not really," Norman replied, shaking his head. "There's no way this can go worse than the last time I was on an actual stage."

... Just trust him on this.

Re: The Bar - 03/06.

[goldfishontherocks]

Keyleth hadn't meant to come here; she'd just ended up here on a whim, decided to stick around when she heard music, and then was obligated to stare in horror at the zombies for a while. But hey! People she knew on stage! Now she had to stay and be all moral-support-y too, right?

Re: The Bar - 03/06.

[not_a_bird]

Well. That was...a fashion statement. But who was Sweet Dee to judge? She was just glad to see that the Open Mic thing was bringing some traffic into the bar, apparently.

...she was also kind of regretting that the Open Mic thing was bringing some traffic into the bar, apparently.

"Need a drink?" she asked.

Re: The Bar - 03/06.

[goldfishontherocks]

"Oh, hi," Keyleth said, after a flaily little jump and wave. "I, um . . . water maybe? I don't know what I'm supposed to order here."

Re: The Bar - 03/06.

[white_oleander]

Astrid was still working on her routine; you'd think I might have actually prepared for this going to just have a seat at the bar before she had to go up there on stage and look at Ms. Reynolds behind the bar with a sweet sort of innocence as she asked, "Do you have any champagne? Or maybe you can recommend a nice white wine?"

Hey, her mother sometimes let her drink at the parties and galas they went to. She wasn't just being facetious. But she also kind of was.

Re: The Bar - 03/06.

[not_a_bird]

...really?

Done with you, Astrid. Sweet Dee was so done with you, Astrid.

"I prefer reds, myself," she informed her. "But, yes, we do have champagne."

She...thought they did, anyway. It might take her a moment to find it. And longer than it should for her to open it. And way more of a mess of her to pour it. But they had it and now Astrid had her champagne.

Who ordered champagne in a bar, honestly? This...fucking kid...

Re: The Bar - 03/06.

[seriesofbaddecisions]

Sabine didn't really spend much time in bars, but she was here to lend some support. So she ordered a Coke from Tino and waited for things to start.

The Lounge - 03/06.

[not_a_bird]

What? You don't want to witness first hand a bunch of people who have no business trying to be comediens probably crash and burn?

OOC - 03/06.

[not_a_bird]

I didn't plan this well, but oh well. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯