Caritas; Wednesday [08/12].

[somethingwithturquoise]

"Ohmygod," said Summer, with a sudden spark of inspiration in a moment of downtime when she was helping herself to a slice of leftover pizza that was still hanging around since yesterday and would probably continue feeding Tino for a week, "why have I not done a pizza jello shot yet?"

And this...this is why it was important for Summer to not have downtime, people. Come and save her from herself.

Wednesday Jello Shot Specials!
First One Free to All Wednesday Activity Participants!
French Martini
Cottage Tuna Salad

Never mind. She was already too far gone...

Caritas is open!

Comments

[1000yearstoolate]

"I'll have the first one and skip the second one," Seivarden said, leaning against the bar.

[somethingwithturquoise]

"Really?" asked Summer, in a clearly, definitely, not at all sarcastic but GEN-U-INE-LY surprised voice. "Who'd have seen that coming?"

But she set down two of the fancy shots in front of Seivarden, followed by the expected whiskey, which she set down a little more firmly than she usually would.

"Also," she added, her tone gone a bit darker and her eyes narrowed, "that portal gun? Was a plant."

[1000yearstoolate]

Seivarden reached for the first jello shot.

"A plant?"

[somethingwithturquoise]

"A plant," Summer confirmed with a small huff of frustration, and her arms folded promptly in front of her chest for a moment, because otherwise, there would be so much flailing of her hands, Seivarden. So. MUCH.

"Turns out," she explained, "Grampa Rick left a low-charge portal gun for me to find because he knew I was going to steal it, and when I pointed out that I could have been stranded somewhere horrible and quite possibly murdered in a brutal and viscious way, he said, and I quote...."

Summer pulled out her phone, pulled up the text and read:

"...'serves you right for stealing my shit. Stop stealing my shit, Summer, you bitch.'"

She stuffed the phone angrily back into her pocket.

"End QUOTE."

Then she huffed again.

"God, he's the worst! I can't believe I ever idolized that mega-douche!"

[1000yearstoolate]

Seivarden was silent for a moment.

"I'm sorry, Summer. That's not how someone is supposed to treat their granddaughter."

She added: "He obviously doesn't deserve you."

This was overlooking the comment about Summer regularly stealing things, but it was a terribly uncivilised way to express it.

[thatwaslucky]

Rey of course looked at the specials before she sat down.

Which is why she asked, with all the sincere concern in the world, "Should I be worried?"

Congratulations, Summer. The girl who would eat anything considered the cottage tuna salad shot to be a cry for help.

[somethingwithturquoise]

Which was, like, totally not even fair because she wasn't even doing this for herself! She couldn't help it if this is what the masses wanted!

Well, the masses being a single solitary person, but that person said nice things about Summer when Summer indulged in her sick, sick whims, so...

Although, to be fair, someone other than Eleanor actually did eat the other shots last week, too!

Still, Summer followed Rey's eyes for a moment, though she knew exactly what she was talking about, but when she looked back, her grin was apologetic, but only slightly.

"Probably," she admitted. But proudly.

She had, after all, introduced her first cream liqueur into a jello. They should all be worried.

"I take it that one's a pass this week, huh?" she guessed.

[thatwaslucky]

"Yes," Rey said quickly. "I mean... it's creative. But..."

But oh god Summer what.

[somethingwithturquoise]

Don't look at her! She was just a victim of google circumstances! Perhaps they all needed to take a good hard look at the real monsters behind this, Dairy Farmers of Canada!

"I mean..." Okay, so now maybe Summer did look a little sheepish about the whole thing, shrugging her shoulders as she wrinkled her nose at Rey. "I started with the bar set pretty high, I don't really have a choice but to get creative with it. But that's why there's extra fancy ones, too," she gestured to the tray of much nicer French Martini shots with their adorable little raspberries on top, "to balance it out."

[thatwaslucky]

"Those are much better," Rey said, trying to be encouraging on that front, and also they were actually cute.

[mother_forker]

Eleanor looked at the shot specials and then literally looked at Summer with fear in her eyes.

"Is this to see just how far I'll go?" she asked. "Because if so..."

She took a deep breath and put on her shades.

"Line it up."

Don't worry, Summer. Eleanor is here for you.

[thatwaslucky]

Rey was worried about you too, Eleanor! Please ignore the actual full body shudder at the thought of doing several of those shots.

[mother_forker]

Eleanor... only did one. Just one. With her own full body shudder.

"Okay. Not doing that one again."

[thatwaslucky]

"It was brave of you to try."

It wasn't smart. But.

[mother_forker]

"You think so? Coming from someone going to war, I'm not sure about that."

Because Rey is a much better person than Eleanor.

[somethingwithturquoise]

And that look in Eleanor's eyes for that brief moment before she concealed it, thankfully, behind those shades, so that Summer actually didn't have to confront it and therefor not actually feel as bad about it as she did when she first saw it, had Summer realizing something.

"Honestly?" she said. "I think it's just as much to see how far either of us will go."

But she wasted no time in setting up a nice little queue of mini little terrible decisions along the bar for her. There were reasons so many of the other Summers were just downright evil, after all.

"Remember," she added, because there were also reason why this one wasn't, "you can stop at any time. You've already managed to surpass a level of greatness that most others could not even dream of acheiving."

That, and the only other people she could think of that would subject themselves to a jello like this were exempt because one of them was sober and she was pretty sure the other one was close enough to it.

Which was why there was definitely a non-alcohol version of this monstrosity sitting in her fridge right now to be delivered to Steeeeve later this week.

[mother_forker]

Eleanor steadied herself and held up the shot in a salute.

And downed it.

She immediately began to retch but managed to keep it down. She squeezed her eyes shut and her face was a mask of disgust for about ten seconds.

And then she finally managed to whisper: "Chaser?"

[somethingwithturquoise]

Oh, damn, that was impressive. And Summer, who had immediately started to make a grab for a bucket, suddenly shifted gears to plop one of the prepared-and-ready raspberry jello shots in front of Eleanor as a pre-chaser while her brain whirled to think of what might make the best actual chaser to get that poured as quickly as she could.

Which was how a shot of tequila appeared next (was this the only time in recorded history where a shot of tequila was the improvement?), followed by a shot of Sprite, to be the chaser after the chaser, and then a full ass glass of water, because....girl.

And then the bucket.

[heroic_jawline]

Steve, who had showered enough to finally stop smelling like fish and bacon took one look at the specials board and kind of regretted leaving his house.

"I don't suppose you invited me here to try the first one?" he asked optimistically.

[somethingwithturquoise]

Oh.Mygod. Did she actually manage to break both Eleanor and Steeeeve with this one?

Was this what it felt like to cross a threshold into potentially unfathomable and irredemable evil?

Summer should not be so excited about that question.

"I mean," she said, "I'd love for you to try the first one, but the second one is the inspiration for the dish I made for you to take home. A regular jello mold.." she assured him "No expert mix of vodka and cream liqueur," which was NOT EASY, no one would truly understand how much she'd actually accomplished here on this day!, "or any booze at all in that one, just a good old fashioned cottage cheese and tuna fish jello mold salad."

[heroic_jawline]

"Just like ma used to make," Steve said, laughing.

Steve's mother would never. "Tony will be so excited!"

It was so cute that Steve thought that.

[somethingwithturquoise]

Tony, Summer was so, so sorry, but, as you could see, there was clear encouragement here and she could hardly be held accountable.

"I'll grab it for you before you leave," Summer offered, because, yeah, let's not have that sitting out of the fridge any longer than necessary. "Do you want a beer or anything?" She was very desperately failing at going over previous social events and trying to recall if she could picture Steeeeve in any drinking situation that didn't involve him probably being disapproving because despite successfully adopting calling him by his actual name, she still mostly felt like a teenager around him. "Do you actually drink?"

[mother_forker]

If Steve were to look around he might see Eleanor with a finished tuna jello shot in front of her with a slight greenish complexion.

Be wary, Cap. This is a tough one.

[heroic_jawline]

"That doesn't look...as delightful as it could be," Steve said.

[mother_forker]

As soon as Summer wasn't looking, Steve would see Eleanor giving him the baseball sign to stay away. Far away.

Which was followed by a belch and an expression of disgust.

Followed by Eleanor mouthing the words "Don't do it!"

Hopefully Summer didn't see that. Eleanor would feel bad for about thirty seconds if she did.