fandomtownies | Turtle & Canary; Monday -07/26].

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Turtle & Canary; Monday -07/26].

Summer was just going to look at Apu for a long, long moment.

"I mean," she finally allowed, "you're not wrong. Bagels are not donuts, but I think celebrating any round baked good with a hole in the middle right now is still a bit too soon. I don't care what day it is."

And so, with that, realizing that Summer wasn't going to let up until he did something about it, Apu sighed and went about the store with his ladder to take down the excessive amount of bagels that he'd strung up all over the place like streamers.

But he absolutely was going to keep them up around where the bagels in the store could be found, he wasn't going to let her crush his holiday spirit that efficiently, dammit!

And that was fine. That could be considered, like, advertising or something, so once Summer was satisfied that the bagel decor was brought down to a reasonable level, she could get started on her usual Monday tasks.

Today's Squishy Flavors
Tofu
Coffee Milkshake
Red

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Thankfully, the hole nonsense along with the random teleporting whenever he tried to leave his apartment seemed to be done. Hopefully the island had all this nonsense out of its system, because Dwight was in desperate need of supplies. Even he was getting tired of frozen dinners, cheap beer, and water.

So, Dwight was glad to have finally made it to where he had been trying to get to for some time. He walked in and gave a small smile and a wave.

"Hey there, Summer isn't it?"

Oh, don't worry, Dwight! The island was probably just giving just enough time to stock up (especially on the booze!) before the next bout!

It could be considerate like that sometimes.

And Summer, always pleased to have her reputation precede her a bit (well, usually), beamed up from her clipboard and her orders at the greeting.

"That's me!" she chirped. "Unless I owe you money, in which case, ooof, sorry, no, Summer's not here today..."

Her head tilted at him. "Dwight, isn't it? New person. Keep seeing you around, completely failed to be all neighborly and say hi?"

"Yeah, Dwight... the new guy in town" he said with a smirk. " And actually....I'm here to give you money. After three weeks in a hole and this teleportation insanity messing with my plans, I am ready to throw money at anyone who can help me get my sad empty fridge restocked."

"Then you've come to the right place," Summer assured him with a grin. "We love money being thrown at us! And you're in luck, because the whole hole thing didn't really affect us that much," if she sounded disappointed at all with that, it was because she would have been okay with, if not preferred, some things to have been holed, namely her boss, but whatever, "so we're pretty well stocked! That said, if you're having trouble finding anything, just let me or Apu over there know and hopefully we can point you in the right direction. We have almost anything, and can usually get most things if we don't already have it. Except duct tape. Don't ask why. Apparently it's a whole thing?

"Oh! And if you're in the dairy section, and a panda starts harrassing you, don't worry, that is, unfortunately, normal. Seriously, it's best to just take whatever cheese he insists on giving you, and if you don't really want it, we'll just take it out at the register.

"And I'll totally hook you up with the usual newbie discount, too."

"Much appreciated" Dwight said with an appreciative smile. "It's been an interesting couple of months to be sure. Are things usually this...crazy?" he asked, waving his hand around vaguely.

"I mean we had our share of craziness where I'm from, and in some ways Fandom is a nice change from all that. But still... sentient holes and random teleportation? There's a whole new level of the odd here that is for sure!" he added with a chuckle.

Summer's smile in response had an unmistakable oh honey... aspect to it, as she weighed whether or not it was worth it to get into just how weird things could get.

Although, honestly, her gauge on that was completely and utterly broken, anyway, so she had no real clue how weird most things she took for granted really were any more.

"It...does take some getting used to," she allowed. "For some people. But once you kind of embrace it, this is seriously one of the best places ever. You just kind of have to keep on your toes, keep up on your insurance policies and emergency supplies, know how to use a weapon, and keep a....really open mind, usually."

Her head was tilting thoughtfully at him again. "So where is it that you are from, anyway? If you don't mind me asking."

"Sounds a lot like back home" Dwight said with a chuckle. "Which was actually not too far from here- up north a bit. Small coastal town in Maine, called Haven."

Yeah, don't let the image of a quaint coastal fishing town fool you- it could be as insane as Fandom on a good day.

"Like here in Fandom in some ways, Haven was home to many people with special... powers? Abilities? Those of us who have them call them Troubles because most of them are not the most useful or safest powers to have. So I'm used to the oddness and weirdness and even the danger to an extent. Kinda have to be when you live with the Troubles" he added with a forced laugh.

The name Dwight dropped seemed to spark an itch of recognition in Summer, who frowned at that itch a little as she asked, "So, what, it's like you all have superpowers, but...lame? Or, like, a whole Catch-22 thing involved? So what's your...err...Trouble?"

Then she blinked, and that itch caught up with her.

"Wait. Haven...Maine. That's, like, not the same weird-ass Haven, Maine that Duke is from, is it?"

Could be a coincidence. Could just be different dimensions. But she was pretty sure now that the place sounded familiar because of all of Lucifer's bitching about it.

"Yuuup" Dwight said with a nod. "That same weird-ass Haven. Duke and I were... well we knew each other. At least, I knew a version of him. The Duke here in Fandom isn't from the same time line as I am... or something like that. Frankly the weird time jump stuff makes my head spin. I'm still trying to get used to the idea that when I left Haven it was late 2009..."

Dwight scratched the back of his head and then sighed as he looked back at Summer.

Here's where things always got interesting... explaining to someone what Haven was like. Though, if Summer knew Duke and by extension knew Lucifer, then she likely had heard all about Haven's oddities.

"Some people's Trouble makes it where their emotions affect the weather. One guy I know has a Trouble that makes it where he cant feel anything, no physical pain, touch, or sensation at all. Some of the Troubles are annoying and others can be a bit more... dangerous. Like mine. And as far as my Trouble goes, it's one of those lovely ones that get passed down through the family. My Trouble essentially makes me a bullet magnet. A gun goes off within 300 feet of me, the bullet changes course and comes straight for me. Thankfully it doesn't seem to include lasers or blasters and such... but yeah. That's my Trouble."

He glanced up at Summer, trying to gauge her reaction.

Edited 2021-07-26 20:28 (UTC)

It was mostly the kind of expression one might expect if Dwight had been telling Summer that he liked to garden on the weekend, really, until one of her brows quirked a little wryly with a grin.

"Good thing all my guns are lasers and blasters, then," she noted. "That's gotta suck, though. Hopefully you don't live anywhere near the firing range."

Wherever that actually was.

"The time thing's got to be fun, too. I generally try not to fuck with time travel stuff, but there's sooo many people here that can't avoid it, I guess."

She shrugged. Like time travel was about on par with seasonal allergies as far as nuisances went.

"Well, I've lived with the Trouble for more than 10 years so kinda gotten used to it." As much as one can get used to that kind of thing. "I will say I was glad to see most people use lasers and blasters... though getting trapped in the gun shop the other day was "NOT" much fun I will admit" Dwight said with a chuckle. "Though thanks to Miguel I at least don't have to wear the damn 15 pound bullet proof vest I always wore back in Haven!"

"As far as the time travel stuff goes... totally the islands' doing. I left Haven it was 2009... come here and find out its 2021." Dwight shook his head. "Does make me wonder what would happen if I ever did go back to Haven.."

"I would say there's only one way to find out," said Summer, "but from what I've heard, that place is sort of the kind of place you only go back to if you absolutely have..."

This was, of course, entirely through a Lucifer bitch-mode lens, but still! Summer gave him a lot of crap for being such a drama queen, but the devil should have a good idea of a real hellhole when he came across one, right?

"Yeah, I left for a reason... several reasons actually. And really have no reason to go back, now that it's just me. No real close friends to speak of and now no family... I left Haven for a reason and unless something drastic changes, going back would probably be a very very bad thing...."

Ya know... release an internal rage... avenge your daughter... that kind of thing. Probably for the best that he not head back to Haven for a while.

"Yeaaaahhhh," Summer drawled slowly, "an answer like that really doesn't do much to convince me that just nuking the place isn't a viable solution."

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Turtle & Canary; Monday -07/26].

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