Turtle & Canary; Sunday [1/20]

[honoraryphd.livejournal.com]

Doom was prepared for the NFL's Championship Sunday. That is, he was ignoring it completely and might shoot anyone who talked to him about sports with magic fire. Apu, meanwhile, made sure there was a nice display with chips and dip and drinks.

Doom considered knocking it down. Meanie.

Today's Squishy flavors: Grape Judas, Cherry Doom, Pigskin (not made with real pig)

Comments

Re: Talk to Doom

[withoutverona]

"Works for me," Frank said. He went off into the shelves of the store, then returned with a candy bar and a check doctored to look like a Pan Am paycheck for $300. "I just need a little extra cash to get back to LAX. They have me flying to Hawaii tomorrow."

Re: Talk to Doom

[honoraryphd.livejournal.com]

Doom glared at the supposed pilot with distrust. "You truly expect to pay for a candy bar with a three hundred dollar check? Show your identification to Doom!"

Re: Talk to Doom

[withoutverona]

"Sure thing," Frank said easily, pulling out Romeo's driver's license.

If Doom were inclined to notice such things, he might do the math and realize it belonged to a 17-year-old.

Re: Talk to Doom

[honoraryphd.livejournal.com]

"Doom demands to know your age," Doom said.

Re: Talk to Doom

[withoutverona]

And behind Frank's bland smile, there were some very fast calculations. If this was 1966 (and it had been the last time he checked) someone born in the 1940 he had "corrected" Romeo's license to reflect would be ... "Twenty-six," he answered. "I know, I still got the baby face."

Re: Talk to Doom

[honoraryphd.livejournal.com]

"Your license claims that you are seventeen," Doom noted, putting the license on the counter. "Take the candy bar if you wish so that you will not starve until you can reach the bank tomorrow. That is the only assistance which I will provide you."

Re: Talk to Doom

[withoutverona]

"Seventeen?" Frank said, managing to feign being casual. "Check your math, buddy. It's 1966, not 1957."

But he snatched up the candy bar and put it in his pocket anyhow.

Re: Talk to Doom

[honoraryphd.livejournal.com]

"DOOM'S MATH IS PERFECT AS ALWAYS," Doom said. "The only options for any who would dare suggest otherwise are death or cowardice. It matters not to me which you choose." He was being serious. His hand glowed with mystical energy and everything.

Re: Talk to Doom

[withoutverona]

"Easy, easy," Frank said, taking only a split-second to pocket the ID before stepping back and wondering if everyone in this town was insane. "I'm not so big on death."

He paused to adjust his hat. "I know it's a big check and a lot of trouble," he tried. "I'd be willing to split it with you, 60-40."

Re: Talk to Doom

[honoraryphd.livejournal.com]

"YOU DARE ATTEMPT TO BRIBE DOCTOR DOOM?" Doom asked in all caps. "LEAVE NOW OR I WILL CHOOSE YOUR DEATH FOR YOU."

Doom was friendly.

Re: Talk to Doom

[withoutverona]

Death seemed a bit extreme for a check-cashing scam the store's insurance would cover anyhow, but Frank was not dumb enough to want to test the clerk's receptivity to this information.

"I'm gone," he said instead, rushing to the door and wondering where the hell he had found himself.

At least he got a free candy bar out of the deal.