Barbossa "Schedules are for other people" Radio

[likeguidelines.livejournal.com]

"G'day me hearties 'n welcome t' Friday evenin' wit' the pirate!" Barbossa said.

It was even Friday night, which was, to be frank, a completely lucky guess on his part. "Tonight's theme be music that be gettin' ye ready t' go outside. I also be openin' the help lines fer those o' ye completely confused about what ye supposed t' be doin' next Thursday. It be Valentine's Day, a day ye give wenches chocolate in exchange fer sexual-type favors."

Not really, no. "It be me favorite holiday, except fer I never buy anythin'."

That, at least, was true.

He flipped on Bon Jovi's "Wanted Dead or Alive" and cranked it.

Comments

Re: Ask for advice!

[likeguidelines.livejournal.com]

"This be the pirate 'n ye be on the air!" Barbossa replied. "What be yer problem?"

Re: Ask for advice!

[sixstandingby.livejournal.com]

"Yeah, this whole holiday thing's confusing," Gavin said. "What's the deal with the little guy who flies and shoots arrows?"

Re: Ask for advice!

[likeguidelines.livejournal.com]

"Completely naked?" Barbossa shrugged. "I be havin' no idea. I do be knowin' that tryin' t' shoot a wench in order t' get her t' love ye hardly ever works."

Re: Ask for advice!

[sixstandingby.livejournal.com]

"No, I think he's got like a towel on," Gavin said. "I only saw pictures. Is he Santa's brother?"

Re: Ask for advice!

[likeguidelines.livejournal.com]

"I don't think so?" Barbossa said thoughtfully. "He might' be the New Year's baby out on a spree."

Re: Ask for advice!

[sixstandingby.livejournal.com]

"New Year's baby?" All right, now Gavin had other questions. "Isn't anyone afraid these things are going to team up and take people out? I mean, this Valentine's guy has arrows, Santa has a flying sled and knows everything. That's a lot of power."

Re: Ask for advice!

[likeguidelines.livejournal.com]

"He also sees ye when yer sleepin'," Barbossa said wisely. "'n wait until ye learn about the leprechauns."

Re: Ask for advice!

[sixstandingby.livejournal.com]

"What're those?" Gavin asked. "Symbols of some other holiday?"

Re: Ask for advice!

[likeguidelines.livejournal.com]

"Saint Patrick's Day," Barbossa said, nodding. "A day devoted t' drinkin' 'n pinchin' wenches."

Sort of...

Re: Ask for advice!

[sixstandingby.livejournal.com]

"Pinching?" Like Gavin didn't think this planet was weird. "Better than arrows, I guess. I'm really concerned about this guy shooting people with his arrows while he's half naked."

Re: Ask for advice!

[likeguidelines.livejournal.com]

"Ye'd think he'd be more concerned about someone shootin' him back," Barbossa mused.

Re: Ask for advice!

[sixstandingby.livejournal.com]

"...I have a blaster," Gavin said thoughtfully. "Are we allowed to shoot holiday symbols?"

Re: Ask for advice!

[likeguidelines.livejournal.com]

"I don't see why ye couldn't..."

Re: Ask for advice!

[sixstandingby.livejournal.com]

"Well, I don't want to piss off this planet's...overlords or whatever," Gavin said. "Bad luck for life kinda thing."

Re: Ask for advice!

[likeguidelines.livejournal.com]

"Ehh, their power is mostly greetin' card based these days," Barbossa replied.

Re: Ask for advice!

[sixstandingby.livejournal.com]

"Right." He was so shooting at some little flying thing if he saw it. "Thanks for the advice! Hopefully I don't have to shoot anyone but it's good to know I can without getting into trouble."

Re: Ask for advice!

[likeguidelines.livejournal.com]

"If ye hit Tinkerbell, I be havin' nothin' t' do with it," Barbossa said hastily.

Re: Ask for advice!

[sixstandingby.livejournal.com]

"I know who that is and I'll avoid her," Gavin promised. "Thanks!"

And Gavin hung up the phone, feeling better now that he knew he could defending himself against little men with wings and arrows.