fandomtownies | Caritas; Wednesday [02/08].

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Caritas; Wednesday [02/08].

Don't ask exactly how Summer managed to foist koala-Stark onto Tino. The important part was that she had, she was feeling very proud of herself, and she was giving both of them a very wide breadth to avoid having the koala foisted back on her until the end of the night.

She would absolutely subject koala-Stark to Tino for the duration of the evening so that she could better do her job, but she would never actually subject the poor guy to having to deal with Tino for any longer than that. She liked Stark, after all. But she also liked not having a koala clinging to her at all times, too.

She did, however, have some duct tape ready for the inevitable moment when Tino tried to foist Stark on the zombies and they found out why that wasn't going to go over very well.

Wednesday Jello Shot Specials!

First One Free with a Karaoke Song!

Red Velvet
Sex on the Beach
Cherries and Cream
Cherries and No Cream*
Cinnamon Spice

Caritas is open!

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Summer gave Annie quite possibly one of most withering looks to date, but she was currently koala-free, and she was going to take advantage of it by leaning comfortably forward on the bar.

"Greaaaaaat," she said . "Fantastic. Never better! How are yooooooou doing, An? Besides definitely not having to deal with the world's clingiest alien turned marsupial?"

"Oh, I'm okay." A little weird in the stomach, actually, so she'd probably just be having one or two shots, but there was nothing interesting about being mildly queasy so it didn't seem worth sharing. "He seems happy with Tino?"

She wasn't like, an expert on koala contentment, but he didn't seem like he hated it, anyway?

"Now there's a cursed phrase if I've ever heard one," Summer noted dryly, but she shrugged, chancing a glance over to confirm. "I think as long as he has someone to cling to, he's good. I'm just glad it's not me for a little bit, and at this rate, maybe I'll hire someone to take him on Friday so I can work on my shots for Irene's party."

There was a pause. A thought.

"Maybe Gladio," she decided. "Who could be mad about being stuck clinging to Gladio?"

"Gladio's a good choice," Annie agreed thoughtfully. "I think the thing to consider, too, when it comes to potential koala-clingees, is that at some point he's gonna be Stark again."

And Annie had been through enough animal transformations -- as had Summer -- to not feel the need to elaborate.

"Also can I try the first two shots?" Look at her just not say that second name.

"Believe me," said Summer, "his transformation back has been a topic of frequent discussion every time I leave my apartment, but he's clearly chosen clinging over social embarrassment every time.

"And, I'm sorry," she added, her head tilting and blinking at Annie oh-so-innocently, "which ones? I can't remember the order I put them in and I am currently incapable of looking at the board to refresh my memory somehow."

"The red velvet and the --" Annie sighed, theatrically, to cover for the fact that she was blushing. "The sex on the beach."

It was a great drink! Probably also a great jello shot! And also maybe a great way to get mildly sunburned, not that Annie knew anything about that.

"But like -- okay, can you get him to cling to, like, an object?" she proposed. "Like how you can get a snake to wrap around a broom handle or something if you gotta get it out of your yard."

Annie's Iowa was showing.

Summer gave Annie a very grateful, thanks-for-that smile as she dutifully grabbed the two shots in question. "One red velvet," she announced, "and one sex of the beach."

Emphasis very intentional, of course, the fact that Annie still go awkward around such shocking and nefarious terms like sex was so fucking charming, she wanted to kind of puke about it.

"And I have so many cat towers that go unused by Pancakes that I have tried shoving him both at and into, you wouldn't believe it," she continued. "It works for a little bit, but he always comes crawling back and finds ways to climb up onto my bookshelves or whatever and, like, jump cling attack. My apartment has become a glomp-tackle warzone, Annie."

It was more that this was an evocative use of that particular word!

"So like, what if you got a nanny cam or something so you could still keep an eye on the little guy," Annie suggested as she plucked up the red velvet to start. "And then locked him in your bathroom, or left him out in the living room and closed your door behind you?"

Boundary-setting with koalas!

"The trouble with that," said Summer, "is that it requires me actually being able to be free of him first. And that's where the problem has been. I have been seriously considering if I can squeeze through the vents in my bathroom, though, because that, thankfully, has been a consistent reprieve."

"Well, there's that," Annie offered, thinking it was pretty rough to have your only escape from something small and clingy to be the bathroom. (Oh, Annie.) "Is there like...a way I could help? Rescue you? Shut the door behind you really fast so he can't follow?"

Mostly just because it seemed really annoying! But also because of their previous conversation regarding those photos -- Annie kind of figured that if there was a way for Stark to not re-Stark in front of Summer, that felt like a...priority.

Oh, please, been there, done that; it wouldn't be anything she hadn't seen before, really. At this point, Summer was mostly worried about Stark re-Starking in front of everyone else, with the way things were going.

"I meaaaan," said Summer, in a way that suggested she knew this was a long shot, even with the unbreakable bound of their friendship, "you could always take him for a day or two, if you really wanted to help..."

"You know, I'd have to check with Diego," Annie told her diplomatically. (She was not going to check with Diego.) "But I'd also worry a little about him getting into my plants, or getting ahold of a knife. My apartment isn't, like, koala-proofed at all."

And here Summer would have just been satisfied with the good old I have to ask my husband maneuver at face value, but she was going to be pretty unable to deny the point about the knives.

"Okay, that's a fair point," Summer wrinkled her nose, but there wasn't even an ounce of malice in it. "Your guys' place is pretty much a horrible idea of anything small, clingy, and curious."

So. YOU KNOW.

She sighed again, for good measure, and just shook her head. "Hopefully," she said, "it won't be much longer. Or, hopefully, I'll manage to conveniently run into Travis. I could probably orphan-drop him at the firestation again like I did last time, but I don't know if I can handle the wibble-eye that's going to earn me when he does turn back."

Yeah, Annie and Diego's apartment was not at all...koala-friendly. Good thing they weren't planning on having any koalas, yup.

"I mean, that does sound like it could work out nicely," Annie pointed out carefully, starting in on her second shot, "given what I've heard about him and Travis from, like, the radio and stuff, and like...."

Annie paused, unsure how to say this without coming across unkindly, but she ultimately landed on, "It's not really fair for him to turn wibble-eyes -- eye, sorry -- on you later if you needed time to yourself without him attached to you?"

Like, that seemed really reasonable, to Annie?

"You would think that," said Summer, maybe with a slight huff, maybe folding her arms in front of her, too, "but, ohmygod, the wibble-eye I got after the last time, I swear he had developed an acute case of myokymia or something. Even though me orphan-dropping him at the firestation definitely helped lead to all those things you've heard about him and Travis on the radio, because if I hadn't intervened, they'd probably still be trying to out-awkward each other from opposites side of a room, or something..."

It was really upsetting that Stark hadn't developed a crush on anyone else she could foist him onto this time around in the meantime. Maybe she should really get to work on that for next time...

"Honestly, dude, I would ignore that kind of thing," Annie decided with a roll of her eyes and a wave of one hand. "I mean, I get that it might hurt his feelings, but also, like...you're allowed to need space!"

Like, even when he wasn't a koala, honestly.

"Maybe you can get him to crush on Gladio if you go with that idea, though," she added thoughtfully. Doing this in a way that would benefit everyone was ideal, of course, even if Annie was mostly on Team Summer Can Do What She Wants. "Gladio's pretty crushable."

Like, Annie had had a low-key Gladio crush for a little while, even.

"I definitely would not mind Gladio crushing me," said Summer, who seemed to have gone off somewhere for a very short while, but don't worry, she'll be back soon.

...

...okay, she was good now. Summer blinked a little, shook her head, and focused back on the topic at hand. "And I've kind of tried a nudge that way before," she noted. "I'm not sure the ~vibes~ are really there. Which is a shame. Such a waste."

Her head shook back and forth a few more times in dismay.

"I just hope," she said, "I can talk enough sense into him to keep him tucked away safely for the party on Friday. I mean, I guess if the timing worked out that he changed back then, it would at least fit the theme, but..."

She blinked.

"Ohmygod, but what if I dressed him up? Put a little bowtie on him and everything, how cute would that be?"

Like, for real -- Annie was a very happily married woman, but she also kind of...went there, just for a second.

Juuuust for a second.

"I mean, that would be cute," Annie acknowledged. "I would just worry about like -- okay, if he's climbing your bookshelves, what's he gonna do in there? Is he gonna...grab...stuff?"

Like, the clinging to Summer would, actually, be preferable over Stark pulling a shelf of dildos onto his koala self.

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