fandomtownies | Entries tagged with bender

shiniernyours.livejournal.com

Bender. Was totally horse ass when it came to poker. Of course he'd peeked at the cards. Bender had no sentience filter about cheating - Exhibit A, Fry.

It wasn't really cheating. Not the got-caught-for kind. But if that white horse wanted to trample the cards rather than call them, then Bender was going to be feeling no guilt about adding those apples to the pile of carrots that currently made up his winnings.

Three kings. Ha! "Read that and leak saltwater, you four footed sack of junk!"

Time for the Bender vistory dance. Shake it!

shiniernyours.livejournal.com

Bender huffled through putting the horses through their paces. He'd run out of beer on Sunday and was 'working' through a hangover. Stupid squishy human influence - a hangunder.

Horses seen to and a quick drink run later and Bender had found a shady spot, where he could write his complaint letter and tie it to a brick. That ethanol-free shampoo (and conditioner) manufacturer would never know what hit them. Between the eyes - or their legs. Bender didn't care.

Now, how to spell 'incendiaries'.

[Scoffs the OCD]

shiniernyours.livejournal.com

Bender opened up the stables and let the horses out into the paddock. Finding a spot in the shade Bender got down to work.

He'd picked out a couple of books, one tucked inside the other. Oh, yeeah. Bender was just going to be here awhile.

[Open, la]

shiniernyours.livejournal.com

"And then, guess who nailed him with a can of peaches?" Bender said, leaning on a broomhandle. The brush-head was - somewhere else. Like Bender cared, or would have been any more productive if it had still been attached.

He trailed around, pushing the rubbish into a fairly rude symbol for anyone who read alienese and snorted. That was his ten minutes of working done - now for the lazing around on a bench. That dent wasn't going to become Bender's-ass-shaped on its own.

The Gig was open!

shiniernyours.livejournal.com

Bender was celebrating today with rough drink and fine cigars. Eh, he wasn't sure which holiday he was drinking to, but humans were bound to have something worth drinking about, and if there wasn't then he could make one up instead.

He'd always liked the sound of Benderamini, the holiday dedicated to the most Bendersome of robots. That'd do.

Here he was, Bender, hard at work leaning by the forge; if anything he deserved a raise for coming in.

[OCD free]

shiniernyours.livejournal.com

Bender had a beer he wasn't sharing with the horses, and apples that he was. Or rather taunting them with fruit while he tried to get them to jump over obstacles.

He was snickering as he waved it just out of reach before jerking it out of reach. Heh. He, Bender, was so much smarter than these four-legged chumps.

[Open, la!]

shiniernyours.livejournal.com

Bender was in the paddock by the time he noticed his problem. "Yeah, I don't know what was-" Bender hiccupped violently, his aerial twitching as a little steam escaped. "Wrong with that batch."

Kally snuffled and batted her head against Bender's side.

Bender tucked a note into his torso - Check the proof of the new turps - and growled loudly. "All right, you're hungry again?" He went to search out the food stores. "You oughta watch it - that ass of yours ain't gonna get any smaller eating like that."

The Gig is open, the robot grumpy and the horses ignoring him. Business as usual.

[OCD missing and pictured on a milk carton]

shiniernyours.livejournal.com

Bender had a knife. But didn't want to kill anyone - no more than his normal level of homicidal tendencies.

He was slicing and dicing like a robot possessed. From apple to chips or cubes Bender set off in a whirring frenzy. A slice sprang off and wedged into the stable wall. Cocktail toppings were important business.

The fruit - stuck on cocktail sticks - were laying askew on a tray that he waved at the horses. Bender looked on impatiently as they chewed. "So. That or the mango? I haven't got all day."

[Post is open, OCD is in Sheffield]

stupid-toasters.livejournal.com

It was the day before graduation. The day before pomp and circumstance, diplomas, smiling seniors and proud guests. What better way to spend that day then partying the night away? That's right, tonight was the night of the senior lock in! Many ~~NPC~~ workers had been busy in town, cleaning up and setting up an abandoned warehouse for the event.

Now, the front of the warehouse was lit up with neon signs and stanchions that would lead the seniors into a huge building where not one speck of floor space wasn't being used for something fun. There was loud music pumping through the building and strobe lights were swirling around the area, lighting up the room in blues, reds, greens, yellows and various other colors. Decorations of all kinds painted the walls, giving the room a party like atmosphere.

Of course, it would just be a regular ole party, right? Nothing surprising would happen, right? Oh, of course. No surprises. Riiiiiight.

The senior lock in was open and it was time for the seniors to get their party on!

[Posted early for super duper SP! This is for seniors only. OCD is good to go! Have fun! Comments are off so, if you need me, ping the OOC thread or email me!

ETA: And there's something going down here! Have fun there and please please continue to play in the party beforehand. It's your party, seniors, please enjoy it!

ETA 2: And the thread to get free is here!. Hack it up! It's moddable!]

Current Mood: bouncy

shiniernyours.livejournal.com

Bender propped his mash-stuffed cask out in the sunshine. He gave it a self-satisfied tap, and it gurgled quietly, giving a slow burp. Mmmm, week long fermented

"Get out of here," Bender fended off a curious horse with a broom. "Brew your own, you greedy grass guzzler!"

Sure he'd secured his still, Bender found a shady spot to slouch back and work in.

shiniernyours.livejournal.com

Bender was, if anyone asked, busy revising for his end of term exams. Right. Not so usually 'busy' didn't look like he was leaning back almost horizontal with a strategically placed emptying bottle.

The forge was open and the horses out in the paddock. Bender was ~~stealing~~ borrowing any bucket shaped scrap metal - bending, twisting and hitting against the anvil as he worked it into a cylinder. Bender totally could work - given the right sort of motivation.

The 98% proof kind.

[OCD-free!]

shiniernyours.livejournal.com

Bender had noticed there were more and smaller humans around the last few days. So far he'd managed to avoid the little tykes, but gave an extra count of the horses to check there were still only four of them. Then Bender counted the number of legs and divided by four, just to be sure.

After all that was done, Bender settled back in the shade with a beer. He'd just had a long hard day at work, after all.

[Open & OCDfree]

shiniernyours.livejournal.com

Bender had ~~taken~~ ~~borrowed~~ gathered some narrow strands of wire and dragged a bench over to the side of the paddock. Two of the horses wandered over, curious.

"You stay... there." Bender told one. "And you... over there." To the other.

He started bending shapes into the wire, slowly heading in the direction of vaguely horse-shaped. Quadripedal, at least.

He'd seen that you would not believe the amount of crap people would pay for animal wire art. Bender? Well, from how it currently looked - he'd better be doing it for love not money. Worthless free love.

shiniernyours.livejournal.com

Bender had a tape measure and scales. Also, a fishing weight and a guide to Chinese opera; these were less relevent to the task at hand.

"About 2 by 1.8 metres," he told the cell phone propped up against where his ear wasn't. Bender nudged the horse next to him. "Weight?" He pushed again. No movement towards the scale. "I'll get back to you on that."

"What? No," Bender sounded offensively honest. "I wouldn't try to sell you..." A background snicker. "No. That ain't a horse. Would Honest-as-the-day-is-long Bender try to sell you horsemeat?"

The high pitched voice on the other end of the line ~~had met Bender before~~ didn't believe him. Vocally and loudly, with quite an impressive vocabulary, before he slammed shut the phone, sullenly muttering about ungrateful equines.

[And open!]

shiniernyours.livejournal.com

Bender tosed out the remains of his recently gotten candy. Apparently ~~NPC towns~~people were much more likely to give him stuff when he was three foot high. If only he'd thought to ax a decent change of oil.

He'd checked on the horses, leading them out for some exercise. Huh. Smudge looked a lot like Gold Cup winner Kauto Star. A robot could do a lot with a horse like that - and nearly as much with a ringer.

Bender turned. There'd got to be some white paint around here somewhere.

[And The Gig is open!]

shiniernyours.livejournal.com

Bender had acquired a small TV and propped it up on the anvil in the smithy. There wasn't any Blurnsball on, the nearest he'd come to had silly hats but no body count, but he'd sat back to watch anyway.

The signal, though? It might have been coming across the galaxy for all he could make out of the screen. Bender picked up an unnecessarily sized hammer and took a swipe at the aerial.

The Gig was open and clags and curses were echoing from the smithy.

[OCD-free/Open]

shiniernyours.livejournal.com

Bender was still on vacation. He'd pulled and pulled and pulled a tacky plastic tree out of his torso. The fronds tickled. It was leaning lopsidedly against the paddock fence.

Two of the more curious horses hadn't been quick enough to dodge the pink umbrellas that were now wedged behind their eyes. Bender had beer - more importantly free beer - and a little model boat he was launching at the trough wall, moments away from a fiery death.

Reality could bite his shiny metal ass.

[The Gig is open, OCD-free and lil bit in denial]

shiniernyours.livejournal.com

There was a stack of metal remnants in one corner of the forge - handles, screws, broken ends of shears and hammers. Behind that pile was another, this one smaller, and moving and cursing more loudly than the first. Bender had been at the cheap non-alcoholic beer again.

"Argh, who turned on that sun so bright?" he complained as the sunlight crept over him, not halted by shouting or throwing the nearest heavy object within reach.

The Gig was open, and Bender was having a hair of the dog that hadn't bitten him enough the night before.

[*ships Open/OCD-free*]

shiniernyours.livejournal.com

Bender had woken up in a heap in field with his first and only hangover. It was only when he'd made it into work that he noticed he was heavier than usual. Jimmying open his front showed a stack of undigested pastries and doughnuts.

The taste and flavour was gone along with his squishy tastebuds, and Bender stuffed the softening cakes into a bucket and hung it on the paddock wall, telling the horses, "Can't say Bender doesn't share the loot."

Then with a hasty snickering, "Not like I wanted it anyway," he sat down, cracking open a bottle of bitter.

[The Gig is open & OCDfree]

momslilassassin

Obi-Wan had much to ponder from this weekend. He found it was much easier to ponder things with a supply of pastries, which was why he was at a table at J,GOB, trying to explain to the squirrels at the doorway that no, he would not be sharing with them, and no, he didn't care how cute they were.

[OOC: For all your vague Jedi Master-y needs!]

Current Mood: pensive

shiniernyours.livejournal.com

The horses were at the far end of the paddock when Bender arrived. He grudging picked up some brushes, and headed out. They moved.

He followed them. They moved again, the grey one looking over his shoulder and snickering.

It didn't take long for Bender to use up his small amount of patience and smaller amount of effort. "Don't think that'll stop me seeing you minced up and out of here," he threatened, "I know people in Belgian restaurants!" Belgians, mostly.

The Gig is open, the horses unphased and Bender rhythmically kicking at a wall.

[Open and OCD free]

shiniernyours.livejournal.com

After checking on the horses Bender propped up a pair of stakes outside the smithy, and picked up a bucket of broken horseshoes.

Bender started throwing them at- towards- in the general direction of the stakes. His aim was just fine, thank you.

[Open and OCD-free]

shiniernyours.livejournal.com

Bender was late in to work - taking the time to do a little strategic rewinding from the weekend.

He picked up a bale of wire and headed for the paddock, starting to check the fencing for repairs. Getting a jolt of cool, clear electricity was just a bonus.

[OCD-free and open!]

shiniernyours.livejournal.com

Bender had wedged a couple of - empty - beer bottles across the yard and, after quickly checking on the horses, had set himself up with a couple of metal rods.

His first swing went -thataway, losing the ball. Blaming his tools, Bender trotted back and forth from the anvil to the yard, the clatter of hammer easily audible as he went about some fine tuning.

The Gig was open.

[Post is ~~OED~~OCD free]

shiniernyours.livejournal.com

Bender had set the forge up once he'd got into work. He found some old and worn horseshoes in a bucket and set to bending.

His first attempt was too small, the second too short, and after that, well...

Bender now had a stack of oddly angular horseshoes at which he was idly twisting. Maybe he should just beat a change into the shape of their hoofs instead.

[OCD free, yup]

shiniernyours.livejournal.com

It was an almost sober Bender that made his way to the Gig late that morning. Xmas had been spent in a dry haze, not wanting to meet the Robot Santa if he came by.

Bender had made his unsteady way past the horses, ignoring them and the note to dump his bottles of beer and then his head in the water trough.

Ahh, cool, clear, refreshing alcohol.

[OCD-less]

shiniernyours.livejournal.com

Coins falling from the sky didn't interest Bender. Not after the first few had turned out to be chocolate. Instead, he'd found a post to lean on out back watching the horses. Also, an umbrella.

"Hey, aren't those poisonous to you walking glue factories?" Not that Bender was trying to stop any them.

Smudge snorted her disdain to Bender and kicked the chocolate coins away. She wasn't going to eat it.

"Eh, what do I care," Bender shrugged; he was busy being lazy over here.

[Info here]

shiniernyours.livejournal.com

Bender was tidying the stables. Bender was an efficient, useful device that rarely ever stole anything, and had no ulterior motives in that regard.

Oh look! A small wrapped box.

"What do we have here?" He took the precaution of x-ray scanning it first. "Another one for me, Bender!"

The mechanical pencil-sharpener clanked in his torso against three bottle-openers and a sharp multi-purpose tool that could scoop out someone's brain - or pick out stones from horses' hooves, either one's good.

Perhaps he should 'tidy' the forge next.

[OCD-free and info - here]

shiniernyours.livejournal.com

Bender had propped the sign up when he opened the Gig, and after quickly checking on the horses headed over to the forge.

Rooting through the scraps pile, he found a length of copper pipe and started knocking it into shape. He'd come across a book of odd shapes, and began bending the metal into a twisted cube.

[Gig info - here]

shiniernyours.livejournal.com

"You lot, get out of here," said Bender, herding the horses out of the stable and into the paddock in a burst of productivity.

He picked up a mop and connected a hose to the nearest water source and jammed it on hard. Then quickly off, robot reflexes not in time to stop the spray of cocoa splash across the floor of the stalls.

"Oh," Bender checked for alcohol content. "-great," he finished, squelching off in search of his suction attachment.

[Gig info here and going OCD-free]

shiniernyours.livejournal.com

Bender had opened the gig, and set the forge going. Not that robots felt the cold, more the warm sense that came from gloat and having something someone else didn't.

The horses had given him a round of dismissive snorts when he'd suggested a game of pin-the-tail-on-the-donkey. Some people had no sense of humour.

[OCD-less - Gig info]

shiniernyours.livejournal.com

Bender had a paper and a stopwatch and an unexpected shortage of cash. Obviously the reason this gambling thing of his was on a losing streak was not getting the basics right. No bunch of meatbags and their wind up toys was getting the better of Bender.

So. Stopwatch. Clipboard. Persuading the horses they wanted to gallop.

The Gig was open.

[Open, OCD-free and info-ed up]

shiniernyours.livejournal.com

The metal junk slumped against the smithy wall could have easily been mistaken for a Bender. Half of it was a stack of iron (76% proof) railings that he had just 'found'.

The rest of it was reading - So you've travelled back in time and left your team of atomic monsters behind - and crossing out the mistakes. There was obviously a market here, perhaps Bender could make some easy money in the publishing game.

[The Gig's info's here]

shiniernyours.livejournal.com

Bender had no real interest in democracy - 21st or 31st century, American or Earth politics. But he did like money. The more the better. Plua, this wasn't even illegal, or at least he wasn't planning on getting caught.

So after he'd propped out the Gig's sign, Bender could be found just inside the doors of the smithy, trying to remember his old-Earth politicians.

Maybe his cheating unit needed a boost.

[OCD-free and open]

shiniernyours.livejournal.com

Bender had had no visitors over the weekend - something for which he had an ice pick, the map industry on Omicron Persei 8 and Fry's tendency to push any big shiny button that caught his attention to thank.

Not that Bender wanted those lousy jerks here, drinking his beer, anyway.

He opened up The Gig, set out the sign and went out back to the horses, where - because he could - he challenged the nearest one to a bending contest.

A short while later and he was smugly gloating at his rival, who seemed content to just occasionally nudge at the metal bar.

Amateur.

[Open, and infopost here

shiniernyours.livejournal.com

After class in the morning went Bender
Still employed at the Gig as horse tender
He watched them gallup
As he propped the sign up
Then sat by the forge with a fender

The Gig is open!

[The post is open, Gig information is here, We're OCD-free]

shiniernyours.livejournal.com

Bender checked on the horses as soon as he got into work. He knocked loudly against the fence, startling the nearest - a white one, no Bender hadn't remembered their names, into turning to look at him.

Visible again, right.

"And don't you forget it," he said, relieved more than he'd admit to hear words rather than the omnipresent censor's beep of the last few days.

Bender pulled a bottle out and, slouched by the office window, took a swig.

The Gig was open.

[Info: OCD-less and with now uncensored Bender]

shiniernyours.livejournal.com

Bender arrived at The Gig practically on time. He'd decided it was better to leave the chronic lateness until at least the third week. Maybe the second.

He propped up the sign -

[The Gig
Horses for hire
Horse-leech (vet) in residence
Blacksmithing by appointment
Help Wanted]

- and hoped nobody had any really sick animals that they wanted fixing. Bender reckoned threatening to flush or roast anyone's animals... would just get him quickly fired.

In the meanwhile Bender leaned back on a bench, watching the horses while he thought about racing and their betting odds. But in a hypothetically not-wanting-to-get-caught way, sure.

[Open, OCD-less and The Gig info's here]

waytoomanynames.livejournal.com

Yesterday, Minsc had helped her carry the gates in. Today, Rosie was repairing the loose bars and replacing those that were missing. Noise and heat rolled out of the smithy. Rosie, in thick leather apron and gloves, welcomed both.

He had, all unwitting, reminded her of why she was here and of everything she'd left behind - the good, the bad, and the terrifying. As a result, she was slamming the hammer down a little bit harder than was strictly necessary to hammer-weld the iron. Not from anger - he had meant no harm - but to drive the memories away.

The sign was out the front and the horses were grazing in the relocatable woods paddock. The sparrows, who'd decided Rosie needed their guidance, were perched on the roof of the smithy.

[ooc: Open and there's still a Wednesday available if you want a job! I'm sleeeeepy and must nap, but will be awake later.]

fates_jaye

Jaye was actually at work, and there early for once, which shocked the hell out of Tino. But see, she got to host tonight, and she was actually excited for it. She'd even brought popcorn to watch. Maybe someone could get slapped in three minutes and the slapper would end up in the pond. When people arrived, there was even a sign on the door.

Caritas Presents
THREE MINUTE DATES
Hosted by Jaye Tyler
Reject People! Speedily!

When everyone had gotten there, Jaye took the stage, mic in hand. "Hey there, so you should all know how this goes by now, as we've had way too many for you to be clueless. Unless you're new. In which case, ha ha, suckers. So, dating sucks, so we get you through the process really really quickly. Now you can find out within three minutes that the person you're talking to is not the one you want to spend even four minutes more with.

"Here's how it goes: I call your name, and someone else's. You get together. You talk for three minutes, get to know each other, and then you'll hear this," she said, pulling an airhorn from behind her back to sound it. "Then I'll call your name with someone else's and you switch. You'll hear this sound," she said, blowing the horn again just because she could, "five times total. Any ques- good. Enjoy!"

[Three minutes = ten comments, which means each person gets five comments in a thread. You don't have to do these chronologically, but try not to Joss yourself. Slowplay is totally fine omg.

~~Also wait for OCD becauase if you interrupt me I WILL come over there.~~ Ready! Set! Go kill my inbox!]

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